Classless Ascension

Floor 5 turned out to be incredibly peculiar. Josh followed his guide and quickly realized how horrifying this place truly was. It was void of monsters but featured something even scarier: branching hallways!

For every other step, they would have to choose between 2 or 3 paths. Not only was this place huge, but it also kept turning and twisting! If that wasn't enough, there were stairs from time to time that made it a goddamn 3D maze!

Honestly, Josh was convinced that this place had the potential to kill. It was so bad that people would die of thirst before finding their way out. It was enough to drive someone insane!

Josh was increasingly feeling lost, but his companion had no trouble guiding the way. She would stop at every intersection, perk her ears slightly, sniff a bit and resume moving. This dog girl was akin to a walking GPS!

He was becoming increasingly glad and in awe of her ability. How lucky had he been that she had decided to follow! In such a situation, a few more raptors would have done him no good.

That is how they cruised through the challenge. They would even snack on some meat that she had somehow brought along. She didn't even have a bag, how?! What a profound mystery.

After an hour, she suddenly stopped, alert. She seemed to be intently listening for a while before she turned to Josh.

"Master, the scaly devils have found their prey, and they are fighting. I can hear them moving quickly, their aggressive growls, and the sound of something hitting their scales. There are also curses, and I think their target is slowly losing the fight."

He intently listened too but couldn't hear anything. Damn, this ability of hers felt like a superpower! He gestured her to keep going. This new individual would be their key to information gathering!

They increased their pace, trying to get there before it was too late. They were getting close enough that even Josh heard the sounds, but he had trouble differentiating them even then.

Then they turned the last corner, and the scene that appeared left Josh speechless. There was a room with a pedestal in the middle. On it, there was a single red gem that looked awfully like shit. No, it was shit!

In front of the pedestal, there was a monkey that he was familiar with. It was the shit shoveling monkey from the initial hallway! What the heck was he doing here? He used to look calm, composed, and badass, but now he looked completely different!

The long leather coat was ripped to shreds, and the cool shades were on the floor in pieces. As for the monkey himself, he was half-naked and showed a muscular torso worthy of a male stripper, the premium kind!

He had managed to defeat half of his enemies, but he was evidently exhausted. Plus, it hadn't been easy as there were many lacerations on his chest that were dripping blood. The creatures kept circling him and dashing forward to slash at an insane speed.

At first, Josh was confused why the dinos weren't using their biting attack, but then one tried. The monkey instantly slapped it away: munching was too predictable. The creature was sent tumbling, violently crashing into a wall.

The monkey then noticed them and turned their way while panting heavily. "P-please help me! I have no idea where these creatures came from, but they're relentless!" Where? Who knows? Josh would never admit to it!

He was about to help him, but then he stopped: "Say, will you have another bullshit challenge for me afterward?" Josh suspiciously asked.

The monkey awkwardly looked away embarrassedly, reminding Josh of that one puppet monkey. But even as he did so, he kept fighting the creatures valiantly. As he was getting wounded, Josh stood nearby and began negotiating.

"Let's make a deal. As long as you promise to let me pass this next challenge directly, then I'll save you." He was grinning.

This made the monkey frown. "Tests are sacred! I won't just...."

"I see," Josh commented monotonously.

"Are you really going to stand there while I'm getting eaten alive?!" The monkey cried out.

"Yep." Josh even nodded with assurance.

He didn't show any guilt whatsoever. The monkey had said "won't" this time around, so he could let him pass, and it was a matter of will. Seeing how headstrong he was, the monkey finally compromised.

"Fine, fine! I'll give you bonus points in the upcoming test! But, there is no way I can completely remove it. This would reflect poorly on me and'”"

"Full marks and skipping it." Josh proposed.

"What?!"

"Full marks and skipping it." He reiterated.

"No way! I'll die before I agree to something like this!" He cried out stubbornly.

"Yes, you will." Josh wholeheartedly agreed with such a statement.

"...."

"...."

"Do you want some more meat, Master?" The husky girl happily offered, not bothering about the suffering monkey nearby. Well, in her eyes, monkeys were enemies.

"Well, yes, thank you!"

* Happy munching noises*

* Less happy monkey suffering noises*

* Flesh-Eating lizard hangry noises*

At this rate, the monkey would take a while to kick the bucket. "Anyway, what are we even supposed to do on this Floor?" Josh nonchalantly inquired.

"A treasure hunt. One has to find plenty of bananas that I hid all across this place earlier. The invisibility spell around them will be removed at the start of the challenge."

"That's it? Finding bananas? Are you kidding me? Talk about simple!" Josh couldn't help but wonder what kind of dumb test this was.

But, the monkey didn't take too kindly to the disparaging tone and instantly shouted back:

"It isn't as easy as it sounds! There are countless bananas hidden in the deepest layers of the labyrinth, and they attack one's mind when picked up!" He then realized he maybe had said too much.

Mental attack? Scouting test? Josh looked at the husky next to him and couldn't help but chuckle. "Fine, launch this test of yours. We'll take it real quick, and we'll be back. Once I'm done, I'll help you."

"What?! I'll be dead before you can even collect half!" He cried out.

"Wanna bet? More importantly, what can you bet?"

"It's just impossible! Let's do this: come back in 30 minutes and help me. If you manage to collect 10%, you'll pass. 20% you'll get full marks and 30% I'll call you Boss and obey all your orders!"

"Perfect!" Josh agreed.

"Let this challenge begin then!"

Now, it was a goddamn mystery how he could make tons of magical bananas spawn but couldn't save himself. What kind of ridiculous logic was this? Anyway, the two of them left. The husky girl led the way but soon commented.

"Master, that guy behind us is laughing aloud, saying it's an impossible bet for us. Finding them is not the issue. He's now mumbling that it takes at least five minutes to resist one status effect and that there are 100 bananas in total."

"I understand. Let's not waste any time then! Onward, let us find some treasure! If bananas can be called a treasure...."

When they found the first banana, the dog girl bent to pick it up and fell forward, trembling and unconscious. The banana had disappeared, and there was now a banana tattoo on her hand. Was that how they were supposed to collect them?!

Josh quickly tried touching it, and that's when the tattoo seemingly swam to him. He braced himself and '” nothing at all happened! It simply settled on his hand as she woke up confused.

"Master?"

"Don't worry about it. Just run as fast as the wind!"

They were truly pushing themselves as they knew the scaly devils were busy anyway. Josh felt like Usain would have been proud of him! Every time they found a banana, he would just pick it up.

That's how at the mark of the 29 minutes, they came back. By now, there were seven scalies left, but the monkey wasn't in any better shape. He was half-lying against the pedestal, using it to remain standing. There was lots of blood!

"Guess who's back!" Josh happily called out to the man that was blinded by his own blood.

"Did you even manage to get 10?" He grumbled.

"Of course not!'”" The monkey showed a victorious smile, but Josh wasn't done "'”I got them all."

"T-that's impossible!" The monkey objected vehemently.

At this point, the scalies, too, were tired. Josh threw the rat in their mouth one after the other and watched them explode: it was great! He then showed his banana tattoo that showed "X100" to the monkey.

That is when the other guy froze completely, akin to an old printer. This made his companion giggle.

"Now, that should be five Floors, right? I believe it's time for the rewards!"

"Y-yes, Boss. Follow me"

Josh couldn't wait....