Sumire didn't reply to this part immediately. Why would he even have those thoughts? No she cannot dismiss or even get remotely angry at his words. This is Yuhi, this is the side of him that he doesn't show anybody. She was the one who told him to show his weak side more. Even if it does frustrate her to hear such negative things come from him.
"I already told you before Yuhi." Sumire took a deep breathe as she reached over and grabbed hold of his cheeks. "There are many snowflakes out there, some who will not fade even if you make a mistake. You just have to find that person, even if it is only one. Terashima Yuhi, you already have that person don't you?"
The same words she said to him a long time ago. This time she can say it with more confidence. Back then she felt like she was in over her head giving Yuhi such advice, but now she can puff up her chest with pride.
.
To her surprise his eyes widened. He seemed stunned, this surprised her but she still continued.
"That person is right in front of you. When I told you this before I actually hesitated. I didn't think it was right for me to say that. What did I know about your life? I am your fan but the things I knew about you back then were only superficial."
But even though she hesitated she didn't regret it.
"Yuhi you have me now. You don't have to feel lonely or keep all those emotions bottled to yourself. I am here! No matter what happens I will remain your ally."
To her surprise Yuhi burst into laughter and her cheeks coloured. "H-hey!" Sumire exclaimed. "Don't laugh at me, I am serious!"
"I know, I know. I'm not upset about it anymore. I just wanted to tell you that there was a time where it felt like music betrayed me." Yuhi trailed off. "None of my fans realized those were my songs, for people who claim to like me nobody realized how similar. No how the songs were practically the same as my recent ones. Sure I experimented with different styles then but they should have noticed. It hurt me more than I thought. Those songs are mine but they became his, they became another persons words."
Ah, she also had those thoughts. 'I can no longer sing, they took away my voice. But the music industry didn't stop, it continued even though I wasn't there.'
"It made me feel like my presence in the music world was so insignificant and I hated it."
Yuhi nodded. "I also thought the same."
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇt"Yuhi-san, do you ever cross paths with that person?"
"Hino is very overprotective. After he learned it was my songs, he kicked them out of the company. Later on those two joined a big production company, and Kurosawa continued his career."
"But?"
"Naturally they couldn't create the same affect as when they stole my songs. They hired all sorts of people to replicate my style but nobody could do it."
Sumire sighed when she heard that. Cheaters will never win, at the end of the day their lies will end up exposed to the rest of the world.
"Kurosawa didn't do anything wrong, but even after he knew that kid stuck up for his manager and chose to leave the company. I told Hino that we should keep Kurosawa, he didn't do it after all. But Kurosawa left. I understand caring for your manager but by doing that he acknowledged stealing my voice."
"Have you ever tried to sing those songs again?"
Yuhi shook his head.
Of course it would be difficult for him.
"You caused that scar back then?"
"I was in a lot of pain. I could have easily gone down the drugs and alchol route but then I remembered how you reacted to me smoking." Yuhi laughed. "So instead I did something else. I thought if I disappeared nobody can steal my voice again."
The context is different from hers, but Yuhi understands how she feels far better than anybody else. They both experienced a time where music their most beloved thing became like poison to them.
Sumire moved her hands away from his face and took a deep breathe before she sang again.
"Once I start beating my sparkling butterfly wings.
There is no stopping me from flying.
As long as I live
I'll keep singing out to you.
I've chased after my precious world.
And I'll captivate it now, butterfly bright."
It was so painful for her, for so long she wanted to sing but no words, not even a single tune left her lips. When she tried to write music she would hyperventilate, and the sight of her instruments would make her dizzy.
"Even my tears will light my way.
The scales that color me now.
Layer upon one another to glow
To shine a light on someone else."
But even during that painful time, she couldn't completely discard music.
"I listened to your songs you know?" Sumire mumbled. "Back when I locked myself up."
She was in so much pain and she felt so suffocated. But when she thought of Yuhi, when she listened to his songs the pain would vanish a little. It didn't completely get rid of it, but it eased her soul.
This person is just like her.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmIt was the first time she thought they were similar.
It was the first time she realized how all his songs after they met were for her.
'No I knew, but I turned a blind eye to it. Yuhi's feelings for her were crystal clear.'
No matter how many times Ru told her, she blocked it out. She didn't want to acknowledge it. How could it be? How could he fall in love with her? How could he like somebody like her?
Her thoughts broke off when Yuhi hugged her from behind, his strong arms wrapped firmly around her. This person he knows her far too well, even without words he knew that she wanted this. She wants him to hold her tight whenever she is sad, whenever she thinks of Ru.
"When I did, it helped me but it was also painful. I realized even then that I still had feelings for you. My feelings for you were still stronger than the ones I developed for Ru."
"Does it bother you? In the end you still loved him."
"It bothers me." Sumire admitted. "Even though he is alive now. I still cant do anything for him."
The fact that he hasn't shown himself once despite being alive, Sumire understood very well. He doesn't want to tie her down to him anymore. He wants her to continue living a happy life with Yuhi. He doesn't want to interfere.
"Ru encouraged me a lot you know? For me to debut. He gave me the final push I needed to achieve my dreams. Even though he knew by doing this he would push me towards you, not once did his smile falter."
From the very start that person has sacrificed so much just for her happiness.
"It seems I can't beat him." Yuhi mumbled.
Eh?
She turned around slightly and saw a troubled look on Yuhi's face. It was a first for her seeing him like this. What did he say just now? Something about not being able to beat Ru?
*Unedited*