FFF-Class Trashero

[22nd Round] Chewing Chewing Chewing

Lovenarok.

It was another Holy Sword.

I had never seen it, but it seems that it could absorb someone else’s power, charge it, and then fire all of that stored energy at once.

However, all of Potatoel’s collected power was dispelled by Captain Fantasy’s loud cry, turning his Holy Sword into an ordinary club.

[Adventure]

“This is absurd— Kh?!”

“No, this is as expected.”

I grabbed my opponent’s neck between his 6th and 7th vertebrae.

Crunch—!

His attack that absorbed others’ powers was certainly incredible. However, Captain Fantasy was larger than all the living creatures on Festival combined. For him, such blasts were insignificant.

Name: Captain Fantasy

Nickname: The Greatest Child

The essence of the project “Captain Fantasy,” which began with the idea of creating a super robot that all men dreamed of, was its size.

Size didn’t matter when I was fighting against ordinary dragons, but to resist the Supreme Dragon of Oblivion at the end of his years, creating a huge body was a necessity, not a choice.

“Wow~”

I couldn’t even imagine I would have a huge child at my disposal instead of a super robot. However, thanks to infinite human possibilities, I still achieved my main objective nonetheless.

He was huge. Extremely huge.

Captain Fantasy’s wings alone could replace the sun itself.

[Human]

He was a GGG-Ranked child with limitless possibilities for growth.

I could confidently say that Captain Fantasy was the embodiment of my [Human] divine power.

I supplied him with energy, like a nuclear reactor, allowing his aircraft-carrier-like size to move.

“I think we’re done here.”

My final battle against Lanuvel hadn’t happened yet, but I managed to keep the planet and moons intact while destroying the angels. I could definitely consider this a job well done.

My vanquished foes’ souls would now pass into the possession of the Fantasy system, and after, they would have to wait to be rebirthed as teaching aids.

“What…?” I clicked my tongue when I saw a naked, resurrected Bananael in the sky.

Thanks to the traits of his “Second Angel” race, he managed to avoid death.

That wasn’t all.

“Hhgnn…”

“Oh…”

Umamiel and Potatoel, connected to their brother by pink beams of light, didn’t die either.

[Defiance]

[Defiance]

From what I could deduce, they seemed to have divided the damage among themselves.

However, not everyone connected by the rays survived. Even after distributing it evenly, the attrition they sustained was still far more than what normal angels could withstand.

In the end, they were the only ones that survived.

But it wouldn’t stay that way for long.

“Wow.”

“Kh!”

“Ah?!”

Captain Fantasy hadn’t even fought yet.

All he did was roll on his back from side to side and scream, but because of the difference in their weight classes, he still caused unmatched destruction.

After being hit by Captain Fantasy’s soft palm, Potatoel met his end.

As for Umamiel…

“Wow? Whoa!”

“Kya?!”

Mistaking her for a rice cake, Captain Fantasy happily grabbed her and tossed her into his mouth.

Om-nom-nom.

He didn’t seem to have any intention of spitting her out or swallowing her.

“You’re the only one left.”

Bananael wouldn’t die because he was the Second Angel.

“Don’t be arrogant. We’ve merely just begun. Lanuberk whispered to me that she would soon return to destroy everything that stands in her way. Death awaits those who give up adventure!”

“So she’s not here.”

Then there was nothing for me to do here.

“From a distant planet, adventurers will be making their way here. Thousands of heroes honed and molded in Fantasy will unite under one banner. Resist as you want, but you will all perish! We angels will naturally become their slaves, but it does not matter, for everyone will be kneeling before the truth of Lanuberk… Kh-kh?!”

“You talk too much.”

I wasn’t sure how to deal with this undying cockroach, but as I began to look around, my gaze landed and fixed on Hanjo, which confused her.

“W-what?”

“Hanjo, this banana belongs to you now. You can chew him or lick him. It makes no difference to me. Do whatever you want with him.”

“Chew? Lick? That is too… too… ahem! Thank you!”

Hanjo tied Bananael with a rope as she blushed.

“Untie me immediately! How dare you, a fellow angel, oppose me?! I am the Second Angel Bananael! The second noblest creature to ever exist!”

“I know, Mr. Bananael. My father was always envious of you since you took everything simply because you were born second.”

“Who’s— Hmm?!”

Hanjo gagged Bananael’s mouth and smiled.

“We have many nights ahead when we can talk about our interests. With you, I’ll be able to surpass my father. I will prove that I chose the right king.”

“Mmm!”

That was how my battle against the angels of Festival ended.

Having lost their commanders, including Bananael, the rest of their kind scattered around. I informed the trainees, who were busy competing, about them.

Like street vendors gathered at a festival, they fought for the best piece of land for their shop.

Among them, there were definitely some who would set their eyes on the city of angels.

That aside, I had to begin my preparations.

“An army of adventurers…”

Lanuvel was most likely now traveling through space, gathering adventurers and instilling the idea of striking down the MAX-Class Demon Lord into their heads.

The universe was an area unknown to me.

I didn’t know the quantity nor the quantity of the combatants Lanuvel could muster through persuasion.

I needed to be prepared.

If Lanuvel weren’t here, I wouldn’t be able to trace her since I couldn’t go beyond this dimension.

Hence, I decided to prepare until Lanuvel had returned, bringing adventurers who wanted to challenge me with her.

“Wow~”

“You’re the only one I can rely on.”

There seemed to be something I was forgetting, but it was most likely insignificant.

***

As soon as the Festival of Heroes began, the alumni would try to defeat me.

I wanted to punish them by messing with their vertebrae, but I just learned that Lanuvel was gathering an army to exact vengeance upon me.

Needing to ensure this institution’s graduates would protect this place from Lanuvel’s invasion, I deemed it necessary to discuss this problem with my cowardly wife.

“Handsome hubby! Did you miss me?”

“… I see you’ve gone completely insane without me.”

“T-that’s not true! I didn’t miss my handsome husband at all, whose absence left me no other choice but to touch myself every night… Tsk! I didn’t say that!”

“… Sure…”

“Oh!”

Ssosiel, upon hearing my call, immediately rushed to my side at the speed of light.

After stroking the pelvis of my wife, who had gone crazy about her husband, I asked her, “Have you ever thought about having children?”

“… of course I have.”

“Choose a cute kid that looks like Captain Fantasy.”

“Do you think kids are the same as sports cars that you can just pick and choose in a store?!”

“You’ve never given birth yourself, but you’re pretending to know everything anyway.”

“Oh…”

I brought up this topic since my conscience pricked me ever so slightly.

Haris, my son with the Sword Princess, simply happened to be born at the time, and my twin daughters, whom Thalea gave birth to, were not at all part of my plans, so they were like a miracle for me.

That being said, I didn’t have a single child from my actual wife despite already having three children from two other women, both of which could be called cohabitants, though it might be a bit of a stretch.

To avoid destroying my family, as Fugitive Senior once did with his, I suggested a solution.

“Well?”

I was ready to unleash my 21st finger.

This time would be special.

My offspring with the Sword Princess and Thalea were conceived before I became a deity. Unlike back then, my cowardly wife and I were now gods.

Wouldn’t it only be natural for a child born between deities to also be birthed as a god?

Even if that weren’t the case, our child would definitely become extraordinary.

“No thanks.”

“Are you afraid?”

“Yes.”

“… What? Really?”

“Really. Since I’m fated to be second, my child should also be second. However, you already have four children.”

“…”

“If I give birth to a child of yours, all of your other children, except for Green Cake, even though he’s adopted, will die. And if Green Cake also dies, then my child will be hailed as your first scion, which would mean his death as well. Such is the cruelty of my fate.”

“Ah.”

I never thought the curse of being second was that terrible.

“W-wait. Can’t you think of other ways to calm your upset wife? Maybe… a more ordinary way… They’re looking at us, hubby!”

“The True Hero can’t be bothered by other people’s gazes!”

“But they bother me! It might not be a big deal to you, but I still need to work with these interns!”

“If you don’t like it, push me away.”

“… You’re too mean.”

Ssosiel’s body became more supple as she pouted.

Still, my wife had a lot of energy.

…

Sitting on a bench in the city park, I spoke to Ssosiel while she was distributing documents to the trainees she assembled.

“I learned that Lanuvel’s going to attack us with an army of adventurers.”

“We need to check if she really got out of Festival first.”

“Ah… right.”

According to Bananael, Lanuvel left the dimension, but that was just his view of the situation.

Even if she escaped, she might just be hiding out here somewhere.

“But if Lanuvel really isn’t here, then you don’t have to be the heroes’ target at the Festival of Heroes.”

“What?”

“We have already found those who will replace you. Parmael, Bananael, and many other angels will stand in the way of the heroes who’ll be taking part in the festival. Hanjo will direct their actions, and General Chromatigus will take her place.”

“…”

“Red.”

“Ah!”

“I won her support in exchange for Boris being returned to his original appearance.”

“Ah… my Boris…”

I wanted to make an actual super robot out of Boris in the style of Captain Fantasy, but my cowardly wife took him away from me.

“It’s okay.”

“He almost killed me!”

“I know…”

“I’m disappointed! You took the side of the man who nearly killed your husband! How can you even call yourself my first wife?!”

“I-I’m sorry! I didn’t think it through. You’re right. Your first wife shouldn’t do that. How can I side with other men? I must’ve lost my mind for a second. Forgive me, most handsome husband in the universe!”

“… I forgive you because I am indeed handsome. But don’t do it again.”

“Yes. I won’t.”

The trainees stared at us, confused.

Were they fascinated by how a true husband behaved?

Stroking Ssosiel’s pelvis as she rested her head on my shoulder, I asked, “How’re things over at Fantasy?”

“I’ve finished everything. Since you killed many important angels, we’ll have to reassign them, but don’t worry. Vice-principal Parker Lee will take care of it.”

“Vice-principal Bakery, huh?”

“He’s very useful… But he’s nowhere near as valuable as your fingernail, let alone you!”

“As it should be.”

That was only natural. How could a person who held someone else’s son hostage compare with the MAX-Class Righteous Husband?

“By the way, handsome hubby. When you fought the angels, did you see another angel leader? Her name is Umamiel. They say she’s not on the list of those you’ve killed. The thing is, she’s extremely smart, although she’s not worth my little finger. Regardless, if left to her own devices, she could become troublesome.

“That’s strange. I definitely killed her.”

“Are you sure?”

“Tell useless Bakery to check again. It’s simply impossible for her to slip through my fingers.”

“You’re right.”

I walked with Ssosiel around Festival, finishing all the preparations we had to do.

Having completed everything within a few days, we headed to the Great Temple, where the festival began.

To meet the inspection team.

That served as the Fantasy Institution’s main entrance for outsiders, after all.

“Why are you so noisy?”

“Wow?”

“Why are you whimpering all day? You didn’t eat some nasty stuff, did you?”

“Wow.”

“Well, that doesn’t seem to be the case.”

Mollansoft’s inspection team arrived soon after.