Keyboard Immortal

Chapter 595: Vicious Tactics

Translator: Pika

“Okay, okay!” The big fatty exclaimed, clapping his hands excitedly.

Zu An was speechless. This guy really is simple-minded. Even though he now considered Zu An a friend, he was blatantly willing to disregard his friend’s safety for his own amusement.

He included Shi Kun in his ire. If you’re going to drink piss, just drink it quietly. Why are you spouting so much garbage?

Shi Kun had a savage expression on his face. Not only had he failed to prank Zu An, he ended up embarrassing himself instead! How could he leave things like this?

He didn’t know why the crown prince would let Zu An go after being drenched in piss, but now that the chips had fallen in this manner, he had to adapt his strategy.

He’d improvised when the crown prince found himself drenched in piss. This was the real plan that he’d carefully prepared.

He took out some blades he’d prepared beforehand and handed them to the crown prince. These had been specially withdrawn from the Shi Clan’s treasury. They were heaven-grade weapons, the Immortal Beheading Knives. They could penetrate the defenses of cultivators and wound their souls.

Anyone struck by these knives would suffer damage to their souls, and it would take decades to fully recover from such an injury. Even for the greatest of geniuses, losing several decades of cultivation would be impossible to recover from.

If the injury was serious enough, it could even prevent the cultivator from making any further progress.

Putting aside those at the fifth or sixth rank, even someone at the eighth or ninth rank would never want to face such weapons. Even they would not be able to withstand their lethal effects. Of course, a low-level cultivator would not be able to hit an eighth or ninth rank expert with these knives.

Zu An frowned as he stared at the knives. There was a faint yet dangerous aura surrounding them. They did not look special on the outside, but it was possible that they had some special or unique feature to them.

He wasn’t about to fall into Shi Kun’s trap. He clasped his fist towards the fatty and said, “Crown prince, I do not have any ability to turn myself invulnerable. There’s no need to test it out.”

The crown prince hesitated. Inexplicably, Zu An seemed to be his friend, and since his friend was unwilling to go along, then he would let the matter drop.

However, Shi Kun quickly spoke up. “Everyone knows about the stunning skill young master Zu displayed in the Clans Tournament in Brightmoon City, as well as his outstanding achievements in the Ursae Dungeon. He even defeated a multitude of experts on his way to the capital, and learned the method to immortality, which piqued His Majesty’s interest. Why does someone like that act so humbly?”

The crown prince’s eyes lit up. “Big bro, you’re actually that awesome?” action

“Not at all.” Zu An was speechless. Shi Kun surely had bad intentions if he was praising him like this.

Sure enough, Shi Kun added, “This humble servant knows that the crown prince has always been simple and kind-hearted, but this person knows the method to gain immortality. Even if he suffers an injury, he should be able to recover immediately. There’s no need for the crown prince to be concerned.”

Zu An almost burst out laughing. Simple and kind-hearted? Judging from their interaction so far, the crown prince was only simple-minded, with nary a trace of kindheartedness!

He sneered. “Brother Shi, have you perhaps forgotten His Majesty’s order that all those who mention immortality idly are to be killed?”

Shi Kun’s expression became solemn. “Of course I remember. However, I am not talking about immortality, I am merely saying that the technique you cultivate is formidable, admired even by His Majesty. He even granted you the title of baron. Since you came to serve as the crown prince’s secretary, you should help the crown prince broaden his horizons.”

“Yes, yes, yes, I want to see this!” The crown prince was bouncing with excitement, his eyes full of expectation.

Zu An frowned. “I’m afraid it will be difficult to demonstrate the Phoenix Nirvana Sutra alone. Young master Shi, are you willing to cooperate with me in this demonstration for the crown prince?”

Shi Kun’s expression changed. He had almost been killed at the entrance to the dungeon behind Brightmoon Academy previously. Even though he had grown in strength, Zu An had managed to stay alive even through his encounters with Mosquito Daoist, the Devil Sect’s Solitary Eight, the dark elves, and all manner of assassination attempts. He didn’t dare fight someone like that. If Zu An used this opportunity to exact revenge, he’d be dead before he could even begin to feel sorry for himself.

Thinking quickly, he said, “Young master Zu’s skills are renowned. This humble one doesn’t dare make a fool of himself.”

“If you’re not willing to put some skin in the game, then why are you talking so much smack?” Zu An snorted, looking at him with unfiltered disdain.

Anger surged within Shi Kun. This man was a rascal from the streets after all! He really had no idea why Chu First Miss had ended up favoring this man.

You have successfully trolled Shi Kun for 456 Rage points!

Shi Kun took a deep breath. “This isn’t the time for us to duke it out amongst ourselves. We are here to demonstrate your incredible resilience to the crown prince, by allowing him to throw these knives at you. The crown prince is only slightly better than an ordinary person. Could it be that you’re afraid to do this?”

Zu An said with smiles. “Young master Shi, are you implying that the crown prince’s cultivation is low, and that he is a fool?”

“Shi Kun, is that what you are saying?” the big fatty asked, staring at him angrily.

Shi Kun immediately broke out in cold sweat. “Clearly that’s not what I meant! The crown prince is the heir to the throne, and does not need to cultivate at all. That’s what cultivators like us are here for! We are here to serve, and take on the most dangerous assignments on your behalf.”

The crown prince nodded in satisfaction. “That’s more like it.”

Zu An had to admit that Shi Kun’s reaction time and his eloquence were both top-notch. He’d even been able to tactfully extract himself from such a situation.

Afraid that Zu An would say something else, Shi Kun seized the initiative to speak. “The crown prince merely wishes to see your skills. What is the meaning behind all these excuses? Are you looking down on the crown prince?”

“Exactly, exactly!” A frown appeared on the crown prince’s chubby face. He was clearly growing unhappy as well.

The guards seemed to be taking this situation very seriously. They were ready to arrest someone as soon as the crown prince gave the word.

Zu An knew that there was no way out of this. Therefore, he made his own proposal. “It seems a little boring to make me take on the blades alone. How about we make a bet? Let’s see who can survive more of these blades—me, or young master Shi.”

The crown prince immediately grew excited. “Yes, yes, yes! Shi Kun, go with him!”

Shi Kun felt the blood drain from his face. He never expected that he would end up shooting himself in the foot.

But he reacted quickly as well. He immediately remembered that this fellow might not know about the power of the Immortal Beheading Knives. He could just stall for time, and let him go first. That way, Zu An would immediately be seriously injured, which would prevent him from doing anything else. Once that happened, he could rely on his glib tongue to trick the crown prince further, and make it through this ordeal safe and sound.

If they kept stalling, though, another unexpected variable might just pop up. That was why he agreed to it immediately. “Fine. Young master Zu, please be my guest and go first!”

Zu An didn’t object to it. Getting struck by a blade wasn’t too hard to take, since he still possessed the Primordial Origin Sutra’s powerful regenerative properties. Either way, he would have an edge over Shi Kun.

He began to think about how he was going to deal with Shi Kun.

Soon enough, several eunuchs escorted Zu An over to the wall behind the door. They made him spread his arms with his back against the wall. Apples were placed on his head, hands, and in between his legs.

Shi Kun grinned evilly, his scheme finally coming to fruition. He handed the knife to the crown prince. “Crown prince, make sure to aim for the apples. With your skill, I’m sure you’ll make every throw.”

“Of course! I’ve been a master at throwing knives ever since I was young.” The crown prince picked up the knife, eager to give it a try.

Shi Kun added, “Not only is this competition about individual cultivation, it’s about courage as well. Anyone who flinches or makes the apples fall will be considered the loser. The loser will have to lick the other party’s shoes and learn how to act like a dog. Do you agree?”

He sneered. Once Zu An does this, I’ll let the entire world know what happened! Let’s see how you’ll face young miss Chu then! Not just young miss Chu—you won’t be able to face another living being!

“Act like a dog? That sounds fun!” The crown prince was practically jumping up and down. It had been too long since he last experienced something as interesting as this.

Zu An sighed. The crown prince truly was simple-minded. However, he still nodded and said, “It’s settled, then!”

Shi Kun wasn’t expecting such a straightforward answer. He also realized that this guy probably intended to take the knives head on, and rely on his defense and his body’s natural recovery. However, Zu An had no clue about the true power of these knives!

Even though it would be a pity that Zu An wouldn’t really be able to lick his shoes like a dog afterwards, he’d still become a cripple for life. That was good enough.

He understood the crown prince well. The man couldn’t be considered a cultivator at all. His Majesty had bestowed countless precious resources on him, and several individuals had forcefully transferred their own ki into him as well. Even though he was stronger than an ordinary person, he had zero clue how to utilize his ki.

Forget about making every throw—it would be a miracle if he hit even a single apple. Zu An was about to be turned into a porcupine!