The Return of the Disaster-Class Hero

‘I have to stop him!!!’

Aslan became desperate.

‘He really is thinking about applying that to his face!!!’

Why the hell did he think such an item would be good for his skin? No, that wasn’t important right now.

‘Did he steal the recipe from the Aquarius Constructs?’

Aslan had wondered why Lee Gun had gone out of his way to pick a fight with Constructs from the Aquarius temple last time!

‘Did he use that opportunity to steal the drug recipe?!’

As a side effect of his awakening, his son no longer looked like his mother. Aslan felt bad for his son’s changed appearance.

It was understandable why Lee Gun would want to make cosmetic medicine, but this wasn’t it!

“No! Gun! Those ingredients are no good! This isn’t it! You shouldn’t do this!!!”

Aslan was a magician, but he possessed the Divine status of Asclepius. So he was one of the top gods of medicine in the Divine world. He was also a master of pharmacology.

“Damn it! This is not fine!!!!!”

Aslan, who was known for being extremely level-headed, was stumbling over his words. He wondered what had precipitated this situation. It seemed his son had mistranslated the words of the gods.

From a human’s point of view, the letters used by the gods looked very similar to each other.

‘Those aren’t the ingredients needed to make an effective cosmetic medicine…!’

It wasn’t time to dawdle! If Lee Gun made a medicine using those ingredients as a base, his face would melt!!!

Oblivious to this, Lee Gun dusted off his hands. “I put the ingredients into the container for mixing medicine… Now that I think about it, I didn’t disinfect the container. Disinfecting it is a must since it’ll be touching my skin.”

Aslan screamed. Someone who cared about disinfecting the container was going to use such ingredients for medicine! In fact, what was the point of disinfecting it if he had already put in the ingredients?!

His son was the type of person to stitch his wound back up using a needle sterilized with fire. He used such half-assed methods because he didn’t have any disinfectant. Should he be praising his son for having better hygiene compared to before?!

“Y…Yes. As his father, I want him to use disinfectants…”

“Ah! I don’t have any disinfectants. Let me just pour in some soju.”

“Ahhhhhk!!!”

The god of medicine screamed as he watched his son pour in soju with 20% alcohol content.

“At the very least, you should use vodka!!!”

Of course, a higher alcohol content wouldn’t be more useful in this situation, but that wasn’t important right now.

‘What should I do? He really is trying to put that on his face.’

Aslan was having a mental breakdown as he quickly climbed atop the water tank. This enormous water tank could fit around forty people.

The mixture of ingredients that Lee Gun had put inside it was letting out a noxious fume. It was a poison that was out of this world.

Aslan grabbed the back of his neck. He had no idea where Lee Gun had acquired this water tank. It was a marvel that he had decided to use the water tank as a bowl to mix his ingredients.

“L…L…Look at that amount of noxious gas coming off of it! Also, the number of ingredients he used makes it a toxic substance. Also, why the hell did he bring this container? How much skin ointment is he trying to create?”

Aslan hadn’t paid attention to all that because he had assumed Lee Gun was making a poison to use against monsters!

Lee Gun yawned as he sat at the entrance to the water tank. He held a pole, which he used to mix the ingredients. “I wonder if it’ll take long for this to mature?”

Aslan felt faint. “He is going to mature it?? It’s already dangerous. I have no idea what will be created if he matures it… Ahhhk! Gun!! Get up! Don’t sleep! You can’t let it mature! Stop it!!!”

Lee Gun, who had been stirring the ingredients with the pole, started to nod off. He had been spending his mornings and nights trying to manufacture weapons and the daytime to kill the monsters.

He hadn’t slept for a week straight. Lee Gun’s head nodded back and forth like a metronome.

“You shouldn’t fall asleep, Gun…!! No. Is it better if he falls asleep?”

While Gun was falling asleep, Aslan wondered if he could get rid of the poisonous ingredients.

‘I’m pretty sure Heaven’s Punishment can hear me.’

Aslan entered the water tank. The water tank was deep enough that it would be difficult to climb back out.

‘Mmm. It’ll be tough to get rid of everything here.’

Aslan decided to take out the most dangerous ingredients first.

‘If I take this and this out, the poison will be neutralized. While it won’t become medicine, it’ll become a harmless lotion if I mess with the ratio.’

As expected of an expert in pharmacology, Aslan immediately made changes to the recipe. Then he yelled toward the water tank’s entrance, “Heaven’s Punishment! You can hear me, right?!”

When Aslan shouted, the bundle next to Lee Gun flinched. It was Heaven’s Punishment, the first holy item created by Lee Gun.

Aslan had no idea why Heaven’s Punishment was able to hear him, but he decided to not think too deeply about it. “Heaven’s Punishment! Come over here for a moment. I want you to mess with some things that I point out! Can you do that for me?!”

Heaven’s Punishment was an item created to hunt down monsters. A weapon of its caliber could turn monster carcasses into ashes by mere touch. Moreover, Heaven’s Punishment had a will of its own. If it had enough magical energy, it could move on its own.

“If you don’t help me, your owner will be in danger!”

As soon as he spoke those words, the indifferent Heaven’s Punishment moved.

Doo-doo-doohk!

It used magical energy to move. Seeing it about to enter the water tank, Aslan laughed. “Yes. That’s right! You’re doing well! I want you to come here and get rid of this and that—”

At that moment…

“Bad Heaven’s Punishment.”

Kwah-jeek!

“!”

Despite having his eyes closed, Lee Gun must have felt the weapon’s presence. The sleeping Lee Gun propped up his chin. He used one hand to grab Heaven’s Punishment, which had been trying to enter the tank.

“You shouldn’t enter it by disinfecting yourself. Bad boy.”

Both Heaven’s Punishment and Aslan were taken aback by Lee Gun’s firm touch.

“No, Gun! Send Heaven’s Punishment in here! You have to send him in!”

“Ah-ha! You must want to coat yourself with it too. Don’t worry! After I make it, I’ll apply it to you. You’ll have a fine luster.”

“No! If you apply it to Heaven's Punishment, it’ll die!!!!”

“Since the ingredients have matured, I should start mixing them.”

“Damn it!!! It has been less than a minute, so how could it mature… Uh? You’re going to mix it?”

Aslan’s face turned pale from fright. If he were in here while it was being mixed…

‘Will I become an ingredient too….?’

Asllan started to sweat. His reaction was understandable since Lee Gun possessed Item Creation, an ability that could turn “any ingredient” into an item.

‘He can even use a soul as an ingredient…!’

Aslan had a realization, and he quickly tried to exit the water tank. However, Lee Gun had already put the pole into the water tank.

Splash!!!

Lee Gun imbued magical energy into the pole as he consciously chose to start the manufacturing process.

Lee Gun had the magical energy of a smith, which could turn anything into an ingredient. It pressed down on Aslan.

“K…Kuh-huhk…!”

Until now, Aslan had been a soul that could pass through anything. He had missed feeling physical sensations. However, it wasn’t the time to be moved by such a thing right now!

“Wait! No! Stop mixing! Don’t mix me in!!!! Gun! Hahh!”

Lee Gun had been stirring the extremely toxic ingredients, which included Aslan, when he tilted his head in puzzlement. He felt an energy that was completely different from the one that he had put in.

“What the hell? Did something weird get mixed in?”

“Pffft! Yes! Gun! It’s me! Please listen to me!”

“Whatever! I’m not going to die because one more foreign substance is added to it.”

What the hell!!! He should have stopped everything when a foreign substance was detected!!! Even one foreign substance could change how a drug could be used!

Despite that, Lee Gun didn’t seem to care as he injected his magical energy into the ingredients.

Flash!!!

A powerful light erupted from the water tank. The light was like clay as it kept changing its shape.

Lee Gun let out a yawn as he checked the manufacturing recipe once again. “Mmm. Alright. It’ll be finished in three hours.”

Happy about the result, Lee Gun lay on top of the water tank. He could finally go to sleep.

In the end, only Heaven’s Punishment was able to hear the cry of despair emanating from the water tank.

A flustered Heaven’s Punishment wondered if it should go save Aslan, but Lee Gun kept a firm hold on it.

“Don’t do that, Heaven’s Punishment.”

[!]

“We just have to wait a little longer, and we’ll acquire a great skin ointment. I’ll make sure your skin will be shiny.”

[….]

And so, no one even attempted to save the poor soul. Aslan got combined with toxic ingredients inside the water tank, all thanks to Lee Gun’s power.

Koo-goo-goong!

Aslan felt faint as he was mixed in with the toxic ingredients. He had no idea what was happening. Darkness was all around him, and he felt as if he was swept along by a wave. He jostled around in various directions.

‘Damn it! Is this how it all ends?!’

In the end, he was fated to become his son’s skin ointment?! He had been a fierce leader within the Divine world with great power. He had gone through all kinds of ordeals throughout his lifetime, yet even he was afraid of becoming an item made by his son!

Aslan had gathered all kinds of knowledge, yet it was impossible for him to predict what his son was going to do!

‘W…What am I changing into?’

At a basic level, Lee Gun could combine the ingredients. However, the recipe was crap, and Aslan’s soul was being mixed in…

‘Will I change into some kind of monster chimera…?’

Monster parts were also included in the ingredients. Aslan thought it wouldn’t be too bad if he possessed the body of a monster.

‘It will be better than not having a body! I hope it is a cool-looking body!’

Yes! He would man up and boldly put himself on the line! It didn't matter what he would become! He would accept the result! He wouldn’t be afraid!

Aslan clenched his eyes shut when he saw the enormous light.

* * *

Some time passed.

“…?”

After six hours, Lee Gun woke up and looked inside the water tank. A serious expression appeared on his face. It was as if he couldn’t comprehend what was going on.

Lee Gun tilted his head as he slowly looked back and forth between the water tank and the recipe. He checked it multiple times, yet he couldn’t comprehend what had happened. With his head still tilted, he looked at the result. “Why did I get this result?”

Yes, the water tank didn’t contain the clear and pretty liquid medicine that the recipe was supposed to create. Instead, a squishy liquid monster was inside… It was a slime.

This confused Lee Gun. “I don’t remember creating such a thing.”

Of course, he didn’t!!!

Aslan, who had become a slime, despaired. After some time had passed, he had regained consciousness. He had realized that he possessed a body that could move, so he had been very happy.

- I have a tactile sensation! I have a sense of touch!

He had no idea how long it had been since he could feel something.

Aslan was moved by this.

- Yes. It doesn’t matter if I changed into a monster. I have a body now…

However, Aslan screamed when he checked his body.

- What the hell is this body!!!!

His hands were like jelly. No, he couldn’t even call them hands! It was just a body!

Slime! He was a slime!

‘Damn it! Why the hell would the body of a slime appear from there!!!’

Aslan couldn’t believe what had happened. He decided to ignore reality. He tried slamming his head on the floor and shocking his body.

By the time his son discovered him, Aslan had given up on everything. He despaired as he lay on the floor.

With a puckered expression on his face, Lee Gun looked at his father. No, he was looking at a slime. “What kind of creature is this?”

It was neither a weapon nor the skin ointment that he had been trying to create. This creature was long past the point where one could call it medicine.

Thanks to his creation ability, Lee Gun had created a new item completely unrelated to the recipe.

Realizing this, Lee Gun let out a deep sigh.

‘That shape and magical energy…’

He was sure of it.

“Ha! I made something weird again.”

He had failed in creating a skin ointment. The slime had an energy similar to that of all the failed items that he had created up to this point.

Lee Gun took a hit to his ego. “Ha… It seems I have no talent for making medicine.”

“No!! That shouldn’t be your first thought!!! You should realize your ingredients were wrong in the first place!!!!!” Aslan shouted in anger.

Of course, his wicked son couldn’t hear those words.