Apocalypse: System of lotteries



A towering figure materialized within the 'Gates of Heaven' made of sand - massively broad and thickset, with heavy limbs, each hand gripping a gigantic hammer or a pair of massive dumbbells. 

Ming inspected:

[Titan Spirit] 

[Rank: 1-Star Epic]

[...]

[Summary: Fraudulent gym owner who sells memberships then disappears, opening in new locations... Has never refunded fees.]

[Weakness: It can die~]

The Titan Spirit's golden eyes focused on the diminutive man before it. It spoke in a booming, muffled voice: "Mortal, you dare..." Here, it paused, the divine light in its eyes fading to become wooden and controlled. It continued, "Congratulations on finding this place. I have always adhered to principles of fairness, justice, and transparency. So I offer you this advice - once you step through these Gates of Heaven, there is no going back. Also, you cannot leave this place for 72 hours. You will be trapped here forever."

"So you're saying...if I leave now, I can still make it out? Then open up that barrier behind me; I'd like to go." Ming pointed over his shoulder, tone sincere. 

"..."

The Titan Spirit's eyes bulged wide O—O.

Boom! In the next instant, Ming was through the 'Gates,' Raoul, Frank, and Kyomoto Jiro landing beside him. Together, they caught the Titan Spirit off guard and shattered its defenses instantly. After all, it was still under the 'rules' control, with no awareness to retaliate or evade. Taking it down so easily, how could he possibly lose?

This fully demonstrated that one absolutely could not get distracted by an opponent's confusing actions during battle, lest one die easily. The Titan Spirit's limbs were severed. 

Ming clapped his hands and then glanced around at the interior landscape, which could be described in one word: desolate. There was nothing special, only endless desolation. 

He looked to the Titan Spirit, now restored to consciousness. "How many more like you are up ahead?"

"I cannot say!"

"I could get a season's pass."

"..."

The Titan Spirit stared blankly at the man before it, a joyful gleam in its eyes. But in the next moment, its gaze hardened. "You despicable mortal, I am a god! How could I ever offer you a pass?"

"Don't conceal your true nature. You see, we have four people here." 

Ming gestured to the three beside him, holding up four fingers to the Titan Spirit. "I could get four...yearly passes!"

"Yearly passes!!"

The Titan Spirit eyed Ming eagerly. "All I know is that next, you'll face a voyeur. Its third eye is formidable, able to foresee your every move. Beyond that, I...mmf..."

Here, the Titan Spirit collapsed, dead.

Ming felt Alice was right - at heart, these brainwashed gods still retained some remnants of their human memories and thoughts buried deep in their being.

Turning, Ming said to Raoul and the others, "You see, it killed itself just for the sake of four yearly passes. You must learn from this - man and beast alike should not be too greedy. Greed kills. We can't be greedy, understand?"

[Raoul looks at you, will you return the money you took from me?]

[Frank stares at you. Will I get mine back, too?] 

[Kyomoto Jiro takes out a tissue and wipes the bloodstains from its fists~]

Ming is so tidy and hygienic~ I'll explain the principles of unified family asset management when we get home. You'll see this has nothing to do with greed."

[Raoul strokes his horns, humph~] 

[Frank scratches his bald head, realizing he has no horns...]

[Kyomoto Jiro finishes wiping the blood from its hands and starts on the stains on its skirt...]

"..." Ming felt uncomfortable but couldn't do anything about it. Clos had given a very reasonable justification for Kyomoto Jiro wearing a skirt... In her words:

"Given Kyomoto Jiro's massive size and swollen legs, pants would impair its movement. Just a loincloth looks unsightly; you might as well put it in a JK skirt for easy movement without hindrance..." 

Ming felt this rationale was quite valid.

[Your Foodie peeks out from your bag, marveling that Ming was right not to choose Clos - otherwise, the current Ming would be Kyomoto Jiro~ Napoleon perched on your shoulder greatly admires Kyomoto Jiro, such a refined lady~]

[Kyomoto Jiro looks at Napoleon and waves its chubby, delicate fist to indicate its pure masculinity~]

"~~" Ming said nothing, just feeling fortunate to have this bunch around. Next, he collected the spoils. 

The twin dumbbells were shoved into Kyomoto Jiro's hands - it needed a suitable weapon. Unexpectedly, it seemed a little unhappy about this.

[Kyomoto Jiro feels these weapons lack femininity~]

"~~"

Ming tucked a fused card into his pocket and put pants on Raoul, while Frank remained close to nature as transforming shredded his clothes. 

They continued onward, soon coming upon a gas station up ahead. At the convenience store entrance, a man in a duckbill cap sat, hat pulled low, only his eyes visible. He wore a black tactical vest, camo pants, and boots, gnawing on a large bone.

It would be an everyday scene in normal circumstances, but within the 'Gates of Heaven'...

Ming approached and asked, "Are you that peeping tom three-eyed freak?"

The duckbill man looked up, green-glowing eyes glancing over the four 'people.' Then he tossed aside the bone, got on all fours, and barked - "Woof woof!! Woof woof woof!!"

"..." Ming inspected with [Eagle Eyes]: 

[Divine Hound]

[Summary: A simp~] 

[Weakness: Heh~]

"Hehe~" 

Ming chuckled and shook his shoulders. Green-eyed [Elite rank], not bad. He'd assumed only formidable foes awaited within the Gates, yet here was a mascot character.

[Your frogs watch the man barking like a dog. Foodie looks to Da Vinci - what's going on? A human turned into a dog?]

[Your Da Vinci sighs deeply - the job market must be terrible for someone to end up in a dog's line of work~ Foodie looks to Napoleon - give him a respectable job~]

[Your Napoleon snorts coldly - I admit I like dogs, but I don't care for freakish human-dog hybrids~]

"~~"

Ming took a smoked fish from his bag and tossed it over. The Divine Hound launched up and caught it in his mouth, then turned and squatted quietly, licking the fish. 

"Just as expected~"

Ming smiled - the tricks for cats worked on dogs, too. Though in this case, the 'dog' was human. Just then, a bespectacled, scholarly-looking youth came out shouldering a broom. He kicked the Divine Hound flying and cursed, "Stupid mutt."

"..."

Ming suddenly pitied the 'dog' - Frank, you should cherish your current life. See how well I treat you?

[Frank licks his paws, feeling he's always treasured the present~]

"~~"

Ming looked at the broom youth:

[Three-Eyed Freak]

[Rank: 3-Star Legendary] 

[Summary: A voyeur who loves dressing as a janitor to sneak into restrooms and film, no gender discrimination - he sells the footage to certain websites for money. Turning his hobby into work takes dedication. Once camped for 48 hours in a toilet to stake it out until his legs went numb~]

[Weakness: He's...ruthless~] 

"~~" 

Ming agreed the weakness was apt.

The Three-Eyed Freak looked up, his red eyes flashing green as he stared at Kyomoto Jiro. 

"Tsk~" 

Ming sucked in a breath, pulling Kyomoto Jiro behind himself. This voyeur goes after anyone in a skirt, huh?