Classless Ascension-Novel

Chapter 89: Legendary Goldfish Maker!

What could all this fanfare be about?

The black squad had completely blocked access to the Tower. They were armed to the teeth with futuristic-looking weapons (at least to Josh) and had placed many movable electric fences. They weren't kidding.

Perhaps it would be possible to breach such defenses by rushing ahead, but coming out afterward would most likely be suicidal. One would be forced to live in the Tower for pulling such a stunt.

Honestly, it wouldn't sound so bad if there was any food to be found. Ah, some Floors actually had ingredients dropping as materials. Ones that apparently needed some professional chefs to process.

How easy would it be if one could butcher the monstrous creatures found in there and cook them barbecue style? Sadly they all had to disappear in a flash of light. Sure, the equipment dropping was nice, but it wouldn't fill one's stomach! (Sword-eaters not included).

As he observed his surroundings, wondering what this circus was all about, he could see vultures circling near the fences. They were all flocking to the place, either alone or in small groups.

Some were colorful: red, blue, purple, orange, etc. Some were loud, but others quieter. Some looked plain yet reliable. Some looked somewhat elegant. Some downright shook their bodies, trying to use their sex appeal. A vast majority were showing their white teeth as if actors in a dentifrice commercial.

But one thing for sure was they were all hunting for prey. It just happened that one such vulture set its sight on Josh. As the creature approached, he could sense its eagerness. Thus a vulture, aka a reporter, approached him. Yes, the kind that would exploit the death of others for their own benefit in search of a scoop.

This specific one was a young lady in her twenties at best. The poor thing didn't even know how to wear a shirt properly. All of the buttons on the chest area were unused, revealing the top of her shapely breasts. Josh could see the caption: <Tower~News> on her equipment. She was in the process of delivering a heated speech to a small flying robot holding a camera.

"I am now in front of the Dimensional Tower where the unspeakable has happened. Many discussion threads have popped up by the hundreds on the Inter-Web about it. Recently Climbers worldwide began reporting strange happenings on Floor 12. Apparently, there would now be a new difficulty option before fighting the Boss…."

She rambled for a little bit, even quoting some random users on the Internet. Journalism 101. Then she turned toward Josh with an expression so serious it didn't fit the amount of cleavage she was showing.

"Sir, as a Climber, I would like your opinion. There are already many missing team cases opened for this single Floor. How worried are you about it? Do you fear it could spread to other Floors? What do you think the government should do about it? Is opening some Climber Schools enough? Are you scared of entering the Tower?"

She had bombarded him with questions and was now valiantly brandishing a microphone in his face. Josh chuckled a bit. This was why it was important to select the individuals to interrogate carefully. He seriously replied to her.

"Not worried at all. No fear. Nothing needs to be done. Maybe. Nope, not scared one bit. That should be all, right?" He unhurriedly asked her. That is how her interview really fell flat.

She had done all that build-up and had carefully chosen someone that seemed mature yet not too strong to get a tragic story out of him. But all she had gotten was nonchalance. Plus, Josh didn't even seem to put her in his eyes. Just as she was about to retort, he spoke again.

"Look, the Tower is constantly evolving. First, you should try to find stories before people die. Second, don't be a tease. Either go the full slutty way or button that shirt properly. See that sexy cougar right there or that prim and proper lady over there? Learn from them."

On that note, he left. Behind remained a completely shocked news field reporter. Her current expression reminded him of a goldfish: big eyes, open mouth, a little reddish in the face. Talking about red, Josh could see another red being approaching him.

The same reporter that had helped him make Credits was here. "Hey, how are you, Josh! It's been a while, hasn't it? What do you think of all this Tower stuff? Just go straight to the point. No need for all the bullshit that we are usually shoveling."

The cameraman accompanying the man looked shocked: "We're live, live!"

The Kool guy…that was his name, right? He went: "Meh, whatever. So, Josh. You don't seem that worried. Why?"

"Before that, why aren't you using a camera bot like these other guys? Why is your red suit so damn flashy? Are you sure you want to talk to me live?"

"Because I can. Because it's cool! I don't give a crap." He shrugged with a smile, giving Josh a taste of his own medicine. In the back came a muffled yet panicked "We're live, live!"

Josh couldn't help but smile. This guy seemed like a complete failure of a reporter at first glance, but at least he wasn't putting airs. He slowly enunciated.

"These new difficulties are called Hard and Possible. It's not a bad thing. The harder it is, the better the rewards. The Tower is fair." Josh almost wanted to add "and confused" to that list, but he refrained.

He kept going. "If one can clear normal easily, then hard could possibly be a good option to consider. As for Possible, I fear this one should be extremely hazardous. After all, Possible can very well mean that it's close to impossible, you see."

It was easy to appear logical when working backward from the known answer. Yet his interlocutor appeared impressed.

"Wow! What a great analysis! Now, we just need to cut that part, and we'll be all ready for…Ah, right we're live. Still, thank you for your time!" He then happily went away, probably to cover the situation with the Black Squad.

That is when Josh realized that his UW had been flashing for a while. He could see that one guy had spammed him over and over. All the messages were from Lucas.

-Lucas the Lancer: Bro, you fucking killed her! OMG! This is one of the best live interviews in history! Her face was priceless. She looked like a goddamn goldfish! I'm just sad your's was blurred thanks to that dumb privacy law. I wanted to see your smug face!

-Lucas the Lancer: I forgot something vital….#NO-HOMO! I just wanted to see your face as a friend.

-Lucas the Lancer: You're still giving interviews?! Wait, did that guy really call his own job bullshit?! Wow, this guy is chill! Also, why do I feel like you know more than you are saying? Sus…

-Lucas the Lancer: Oh yeah, I should probably have started with that, but we're waiting for you at the Guild.

As expected of him, there was lots of random rambling. Before long, Josh was pushing the doors to the gold member area of Draconic.

"Sup, everyone!" He called out. "Were you guys really just wasting your time here?"

Then came a cacophony of greetings and people complaining that he sure took his time. That it had already been half a day since the Tower ban had been established.

The various members could be seen. The few he was familiar with were all there except Kasha that was noticeably missing. Ronan, Liam, Lucas (of course), Lily, even Dario that promptly began speaking.

"Josh, let's cut to the chase. What level are you right now?!" He looked burdened.

"Eh, level 13, why?"

"Nice! Okay, here is the situation. Many groups have gone inside the new difficulties. The Hard one has been cleared already and gives items at a higher drop rate. We theorize that it should help in getting rare drops, too."

Josh simply nodded along.

"The Possible difficulty was originally mostly ignored, but then people started disappearing en masse. That is when we finally put 2 and 2 together and realized that it is, in fact, a hellish one. No one that entered it so far has survived. The name and how it appears left of Normal are a trap!"

Wait, it showed: Possible, Normal, Hard?! No wonder people were dying! The Tower really had screwed up on that one. Talk about misleading! But there was one thing puzzling Josh.

"So, how are you guys getting statistics in the Tower exactly?"

"We base it on the people that said that they were going to try the Possible difficulty and disappeared right after. All the missing cases will turn into death reports in a few days. Now comes the difficult part. We've been asked to clear Floor 12."

It was obvious where this discussion was going. Still, there was one point that Josh didn't understand. "Can't you guys just send our strongest to clear it? The level 40+ should be able to handle it alone, no?"

Dario gave a heavy sigh. "If only it was that easy. While we can enter any Floor under our level, the specific rewards and challenges cannot be activated. The monsters barely drop even common stuff like materials. We can't even make the Boss spawn on Floor 12."

Josh finally understood why people only kept Climbing upward. It had most likely been designed in such a way to prevent them from abusing their high levels. Dario's entire being straightened up as he gazed at Josh with solemnity.

"Josh, the only way I see us clearing it is with your help. If you agree, I will put you in charge of leading a team of Climbers from other S-ranked guilds. We just need to figure out what such Possible difficulty gives as a reward. I know it's a lot to ask, but-"

"Yeah, nope. Not interested…" Josh denied him instantly.

Dario already began to nod understandingly. He truly couldn't force Josh to go on such a deadly journey. No sane man would ever accept that. But then Josh finished his sentence.

"…I'm done farming it already. As long as they are ready to fight a few hundred to thousands of spiders at a time, it's not that difficult, really. I can show you some of the drops if you want…."

That is when Josh took out some weird cocoon from his inventory. He didn't care about the overwhelmed Dario as he started taking out item after item slowly, keeping 3 of each for his own use (Only 1 robe).

The man was completely stunned. The impossible task he was worrying about …had already been completed?! Solo to boot?! Wait, there was more! Josh had used the term "farm". He had completed it not once but many times over and over?!

The more items Josh took out, and the more fantastic the guild master's face became. All until Lucas felt the need to comment. "Wow! Another goldfish!" Then he began taking pictures of all the members that looked like they were traumatized. "So many goldfishes! Very impressive, mister Josh. This lowly advisor thinks you could open a pet shop."

But Josh had a question of his own. "Right, where's Kasha anyway? We literally talked about Floor 12 and item sets a few days ago."

Liam promptly chimed in. "She's off fighting some criminal from city H that tried to infiltrate the area of Metropolis C. But, most importantly, did you just say item set?!" His voice was akin to a kid on Christmas eve.

Liam was the one that had dashed straight to kill the Cerberus Boss in the tutorial while "Nerding" about it. With an incredibly brilliant smile, he slowly began wearing the items covering the Floor.

That is when Josh turned toward Dario once more. "Guild Leader, there is something way more important than this little Tower trifle."

Dario had just regained his spirit that he already had to face the somber Josh. Trifle? This "trifle" had already sent the entire world into a frenzy! What could be worse?! He could feel the pressure as he prepared himself mentally. Was there a world calamity incoming?!

He barely heard Josh over the deafening sound of his own heartbeat, every word cutting into his psyche like the sharpest weapon. "Guild leader, what happened to my reward for that school mission?"

That was it?! Seriously?!

Needless to say, there were now more Goldfishes. For a different reason this time…