Conquering His Cold Heart

297 Drowning in Guilt

Everard felt a stinging pain in his heart when Jerome didn’t immediately deny the random accusation. “You did think that I killed other people as well, didn’t you?”

Jerome guiltily scratched his chin and apologized, “Please forgive me for assuming things, Your Majesty. You were nowhere to be found for a few hours, and I… Umm… I apologize again. I am not in the right state of my mind.”

Everard was dumbfounded when Jerome accepted that he indeed thought that way. He got up on his feet and stood while directly facing Jerome.

Then he asked in an even more hurt voice, “Why would you even think that? I am not a serial killer, Jerome! I was drowning in guilt so I wanted to be left alone. Even now, I can’t seem to forget that eerie feeling that took over my mind at that time. That’s why I came here to see you, thinking you would help me.”

Jerome kept on hanging his head low for offending the King.

Everard looked at Jerome with a sad look in his eyes and mumbled in his guilt-ridden voice, “I think I will take my own life if I ever… kill another person again. The burden, the guilt… It’s just too much for me to handle.”

Everard didn’t know how much Jerome felt at peace when he said that. Everard had disappeared for quite a few hours after he had killed Graham in the heat of the moment. And since he was nowhere to be found, Jerome almost believed that the real culprit behind the other mysterious deaths was also Everard.

“What are you thinking?” Everard asked Jerome when he saw the latter lost in his deep thoughts.

Jerome took a deep breath and replied, “No, it’s nothing.” He tapped his foot on the floor for a while and said, “Your Majesty, I think I don’t need to remind this to you but… I think you should start working on controlling your rage from now on. Else, just like today, you will end up doing things that you will regret.”

.....

Everard knitted his brows together and nodded his head. “I never knew the anger could completely take over my mind like that. At that time, all I could think of was violence and nothing else. It was like… It was like I was completely a different person.”

“Yes, our rage is very strong and dangerous.” Jerome’s irises dilated when he further mumbled, “And if we let it take control of our rational mind, we will be no more than some savage animals roaming in the forest.”

There was complete silence in the room for a few minutes. Both of them were reflecting on the things that had happened during the day.

“What happened to Graham’s body?” Everard asked in a low voice.

Jerome cleared his throat and answered, “I had the room cleaned up. And I handed over his body to his family. I made them aware of the things that he did and how his action adversely affected you. They were obviously not happy about how he died without even getting a chance for a fair trial. But they aren’t angry at you since how he tried to take the law in his own hands was a serious crime.”

Everard felt the pit of his stomach twisting very badly when he heard that Graham had a family. “Does he have any children?” he asked, hoping to hear a ‘no’ for an answer.

However, he felt his heart aching upon hearing Jerome’s reply. “Yes. He has two sons and a daughter.”

“How old are they?” Everard gulped and shakily breathed out, preparing himself to feel guiltier than before.

Jerome could tell how Everard would feel after hearing the answer. But he didn’t try to conceal the information because he wanted Everard to take the full burden of killing someone like that.

‘At least it might prevent him from repeating the same mistake in the future,’ Jerome thought to himself and then replied, “The sons are 14 and 12 years old. And the daughter is 8. And now, they just have a single mother who they can depend on.”

Everard felt like punching himself in the gut for acting out rashly and not even thinking about the consequences before he ripped the heart of that man like that.

He sat down on the chair again and held his head with both of his hands. And he started cursing himself, ‘What have I done? I stole their father from them! They might not have anything against me now because they don’t understand much… But in the future, I am sure that they will resent me greatly… I just earned more enemies, didn’t I?’

After a long battle in his head, Everard lifted his head to look at Jerome and gave an order to him, “Please take care of their needs… That is the least I can do.”

“Sure, Your Majesty,” Jerome replied and gave a slight bow to the King.

Everard turned his head and looked at the open door. He thought of going back to his bedchamber and drowning himself in the ocean of guilt for the rest of the night.

Just when he was about to get up from the chair, Jerome cleared his throat and said, “Your Majesty, there’s something that you might want to know.”

“What is it?” Everard asked.

Jerome clasped his hands together and replied, “Earlier, I received the news that there had been an incident in the Atkinson manor. Um…”

“What incident?” Everard narrowed his eyes and sarcastically asked, “Did they burn down the whole distillery to hide their tax fraud or something?”

Jerome sighed and replied in a serious manner, “I would have been happy if that was the news that I was going to deliver to you. But it is something more serious.”

“What is it?” Everard was still thinking it was related to the investigation that he had carried out during the day.

But he was stunned when he heard Jerome.

“Both the alpha and the beta of the Atkinson clan were murdered, along with three other werewolves of the same clan.”