I'm Not Going to Be Bullied By a Girl

Chapter 813: Mushroom Protector

According to that self-study agreement, the nightly self-study sessions will be held from 6:15pm – 8pm. 5pm – 6pm will be used for dinner.

Approximately an hour for dinner should be plenty of time. Students who live close to school (like me) should have enough time to go home and eat, but it might be a bit tight on time. If you’re like Eunuch Cao and your home is right behind the school, then it might be worth it to head home once.

Based on the experience of previous third years, the majority of students would first fill up a bit on snacks, then they will eat dinner at home after the study session ends at 8pm.

Although the evening study system hasn’t started yet, Xiao Qin, Xiong YaoYue, and I, ate our snacks at around 6:15pm. Zhuang Ni and Gong Cai Cai, who were halfway finished with the blackboard drawing, sat pretty far away from us, and began to eat their bento.

The last time I was at the class leader’s house, I learned that Zhuang Ni’s cooking skills were unexpectedly very good, which she had learned by studying “magic potions” in witchcraft.

She was now eating the meal she originally prepared for the class leader with Gong CaiCai, so it wasn’t a waste.

“Is, is this curry mushrooms?” Gong CaiCai asked as she picked up a piece of food.

“That’s right.” Zhuang Ni, who looked like she didn’t have an appetite, replied, “I know you don’t really like meat, so I made more vegetable dishes.”

“But, didn’t you originally prepare this for the class leader…”

“Haha, Cai Cai, are you jealous?” Zhuang Ni reached out and rubbed her cheeks.

“The class leader would eat the same things as you. I only used less meat just in case you would eat it.”

Gong CaiCai nodded and easily accepted Zhuang Ni’s explanation. I can’t believe Gong CaiCai easily accepted that she was a backup option.

“Does my curry mushrooms taste good?”

“Um… it’s a bit spicy, but it’s pretty good.”

“What about the oyster mushrooms. It’s sweet and sour, I’ll feed you.”

Gong CaiCai couldn’t really decline and could only eat the piece Zhuang Ni passed over.

“Hahahahaha, hahahahaha.” Xiong YaoYue, who finished her skewer in a few bites, suddenly began laughing out loud while slapping the table.

“Zhuang Ni is known as the man hater, but all the dishes she cooks are mushrooms! How do you like mushrooms when you hate men?”

Damn, Xiong YaoYue, that’s a bit inappropriate. It would have been if it was all girls here, but I was here. Are you really treating me as one of your close female friends?

Xiao Qin whispered: “I also like Ye Lin classmate’s mushroom. It doesn’t matter if it’s a push shroom or a nuclear shroom, I like all of it.”

When Xiong YaoYue made the connection between mushrooms and men, Gong CaiCai choked and her coughing made her chest shake violently. Zhuang Ni looked at Xiong YaoYue with hatred as she patted Gong CaiCai’s back.

“I only like to use mushrooms as an ingredient because it can grow without sunlight.”

Zhuang Ni said coldly.

“Also, there are many recipes in witchcraft that use mushrooms, especially poisonous mushrooms. Do you guys want to give it a try?”

Xiong YaoYue raised her shoulders in fear and shivered.

Zhuang Ni continued to say: “It doesn’t really affect me when you make connections between mushrooms and male sex organs. You have to understand, the first step when using mushrooms as an ingredient is to cut the mushrooms…”

Now it was my turn to shiver.

“I won’t let you hurt Ye Lin classmate.” Xiao Qin held out both her arms in front of me, “I’ll protect Ye Lin classmate’s mushroom.”

I don’t need need you to protect something that obscene, okay? It’s embarrassing even thinking about it, but you actually said it out loud. Do you think you’re a magic girl from an anime or something? Even if you were a magic girl, you should be protecting the earth, protecting dreams, or protecting your friends. What kind of magic girl protects a boys mushroom? Is it a magic girl from a H anime?

“Say, Cai Cai, are the mushrooms Zhuang Ni made tasty?”

Xiong YaoYue likes to think about other people’s food once she has nothing in her mouth. It seems she forgot she ridiculed Zhuang Ni earlier and already set her eyes on their lunchbox.

Zhuang Ni usually never has an appetite and can survive with water and air, so it was only Gong CaiCai eating the boxed lunch for two. Gong CaiCai also had a small appetite, so half of the boxed lunch was still left untouched.

“It’s delicious, do you want to come and try it?” Gong CaiCai trembled right after she said it because she was afraid that Zhuang Ni might be angry at her since she invited Xiong YaoYue without her permission.

Zhuang Ni gave Xiong YaoYue a contemptuous glance, “The boxed lunch might be covered with Cai Cai’s spit, do you mind?”

“I don’t mind.” Xiong YaoYue replied, “I don’t mind even if someone took a bite as long as it tastes good. Can Zhuang Ni really cook? Cai Cai, don’t lie to me.”

“Hmph, I mind.” Zhuang Ni narrowed her eyes and said to Xiong YaoYue, “I still have uses for Cai Cai’s saliva, so how can I give it to you? Saliva is a very important material for witchcraft…”

Gong CaiCai got scared and dropped her chopsticks on the ground.

“Zhuang Ni, what are you going to do with my saliva? Are you going to use witchcraft on me? Don’t turn me into something strange, especially don’t turn me into a toad…”

“I won’t.” Zhuang Ni gently stroked the curly hair on the top of Gong CaiCai’s head and comforted her, “Cai Cai is so cute, so how would I be willing to turn you into a toad? If I was going to change you into something, it would be a small white rabbit and then I’ll feed you carrots all day long…”

“Ahahahahaha, carrots!”

Xiong YaoYue, who would laugh at the littlest things, laughed out loud. She spent too much of her time with boys, so whenever she heard words like ‘mushroom’, ‘cucumber’, ‘eggplant’, or ‘carrot’, she would immediately tell dirty jokes and even make boys blush.

Zhuang Ni glared at Xiong YaoYue, then continued to say to Gong CaiCai, “After I get your saliva, at most, I’ll only use a little ‘love voodoo’ to enhance our relationship, so you don’t have to worry.”

Gong CaiCai then picked up the chopsticks on the floor and apologized to Zhuang Ni, “Sorry, I dropped the chopsticks on the floor, I’ll go rinse them right away.”

“It doesn’t matter, you can use my chopsticks first. We could wait until you’re full first.”

“I, I’m already full.” Gong CaiCai panicked, “I was already full earlier, thanks for the meal. The food was very delicious and please don’t use witchcraft on me…”

“It’s just a little spell to improve our relationship…” Zhuang Ni faked a sigh, “Don’t tell me that you hate me and don’t want a better relationship with me?”

“No, not at all.” Gong CaiCai, who was afraid to hurt others, quickly denied it, “Zhuang Ni classmate might be a bit strange, but I wasn’t bullied in my first year all because of Zhuang Ni and the class leader.”

“Although, although sometimes you would lie to me…” Gong CaiCai added meekly afterwards.

An imperceptible smile showed up on the corner of Zhuang Ni’s mouth, then she put away the boxed lunch. It looked like she really planned to go home and cast an unreliable love spell.

“Tsk, who cares if don’t give me food.” Xiong YaoYue leaned back in the chair and said.

“Don’t admit defeat.” Xiao Qin gave a pep talk, “I have dried fish snacks in my bag. I’ll take them out and share them with everyone.”

Soon, packets of 16g dried small fish snacks were distributed to me and Xiong YaoYue. Xiao Qin also took a few packets of dried fish and showed them to Zhuang Ni and Gong Cai Cai, saying:

“I’ll share the dried fish with you guys too as long as you promise not to hurt Ye Lin classmate’s mushroom.”

“I, I’m trying to be a vegetarian.” Gong CaiCai lowered her head and said, “And I was never planning on hurting anyone…”

Zhuang Ni gave Xiao Qin a cold look, “I don’t have an appetite, keep the dried fish for yourself.”

Xiao Qin pouted and walked back, then she distributed a few more packs to Xiong YaoYue. Xiong YaoYue ate them quickly, then she licked her fingers afterwards to recall the salty taste.

I didn’t really like fish, so I ate only one pack and gave the rest back to Xiao Qin, so she and Xiong YaoYue could share it.

After eating to her heart’s content, Xiong YaoYue, who had already finished her duties, had no plans on leaving. She was going to stay with me and Xiao Qin and watch them finish the chalkboard art, then head home together.

Gong CaiCai, as a specialist in artistic writing, proposed two designs for the slogan, one was “I can do it.”, the other was “New semester, new start”, but both were rejected by Zhuang Ni.

Zhuang Ni thought those slogans didn’t have any personality, but it was also too energetic and wasn’t in line with her dark aesthetic.

In particular, when Gong CaiCai also proposed to draw a boy and girl underneath the slogan, it was naturally rejected by Zhuang Ni.

“It’s okay to draw two girls, but I’ll never draw something as nasty as men.”

“(^__^) hehehe…” Xiao Qin laughed from behind, “It seems that Zhuang Ni’s drawing skills aren’t flawless, she can’t even draw men. A lot of men have appeared on my manga.”

No, instead of men, it’s more accurate to say they are eggplants with beards or potatoes with double chins.

The theme of the drawing was finally decided by Zhuang Ni: a cold and desolate starry sky.

The blue-black universe, which had the Milky Way and stars scattered through it, is reminiscent of the cold universe as depicted by Liu Cixin’s “The Three-Body Problem”.

Zhuang Ni was able to achieve an effect that normal people need watercolor to achieve with only chalk. She also completed it quickly and the entire board was filled with a cold and dark beauty.

There wasn’t a single Chinese word on the board, but at the top, Gong CaiCai wrote a sentence in English, which translates to “New semester, there is still hope”.

It was the result of a compromise which took Gong CaiCai’s opinion into account, but it still looked like it was full of emptiness and despair.

Would it be that hard to write “New semester, new hope”? Also, why does the slogan seem like a self-deceiving lie as if you’re trying to tell yourself that “humanity won’t be wiped out by aliens”?