Lazy Dungeon Master

The Waitress and a Secret

Today, Shikina was waiting tables in the dining room.

Can this disappointing elf actually do her job properly and take the shifts Rokuko set for her? I had my doubts about that, so I decided to observe her through Menu-san’s monitor function.

“Thank you for waiting!”

With a bang, Shikina placed a set meal on the table.

Seeing that, Ichika, the one working together with her as her teacher, drew an eyebrow.

“C’mon Shikina, would it hurt to do it a bit more carefully? Yer not doin’ it right at all.”

“Sir! Understood!”

With that, she placed the next one down carefully.

In fact, she did it so carefully that it took her almost thirty seconds to put the dishes on the table ever-so-soundlessly.

“Slow! Do it faster! Do it carefully and quickly!”

“Sir! Understood!”

With that, she alternated between going too slow and too hard back and forth until finally settling into doing it with just the right mix of both.

“… Alright! Don’t forget how ya did that!”

“Sir! Thank you very much, instructor!”

Shikina spoke and saluted her.

The guest adventurers all started to clap for some reason. I guess they see Shikina giving it her all at being a waitress favorably.

“Maaan, how cute. Ya got a boyfriend?”

“I-I don’t have a boyfriend, but I am Master Kehma’s apprentice!”

“An elf huh? Pretty rare around these parts, where’d ya come from?”

“The imperial capital! I came to be Master Kehma’s apprentice!”

“You got a nice ass there, I wanna slap it around.”

“The only person who can slap me around is Master Kehma!”

Shikina even answered the adventurers’ questions with her all.

“The Village Chief again, eh?”

“I know, right? All of the village’s beauties flock to Kehma-san.”

“At least share one of them with us…”

And so some hate got directed toward me. The elf’s just saying all that on her own, cut it out.

Besides, there’s that Guild Receptionist-san if you want a beauty, so it’s not like they’re all just going for me.

“Ooooh? Dear customer, ya sure ya should be sayin’ that? There’s female adventurers too.”

“They all got men though!”

“How ’bout doin’ what Roppu’s veteran group does? They’re makin’ a name for themselves for training newcomers, so if ya teach some new girls ya might just get to kiss ’em.”

“… But wouldn’t they still be vigilant against people sayin’ they want to teach ’em?”

Ichika grinned.

“Which! Is! Why! Ya take a commission for training newbies from the guild! They should have a bit of confidence in ya if it’s done through the guild. Well, ya’ll have to actually do the job but then ya getta be a cool senior adventurer to ’em… yeah?”

” !! ”

“I’m… going to go take a commission, be back in a bit.”

“Oi, I’m not about to let ya get a head start on me!”

“Have fun~, come again~”

After listening to Ichika, several of the adventurers who were lounging about the dining room stood up and ran out without even finishing their food.

A certain female adventurer (with a boyfriend) spoke to Ichika.

“Hey, Ichika-san. The new adventurer training commissions you mentioned, what’s the chances they actually get put in charge of a new girl?”

“I wonder~? Those commissions usually get assigned to people the same sex, so I guess it’ll just depend if there’s an uneven number? But there’s been a loooot of newbies comin’ recently~, maybe they’ll hit it big and win~”

“So how much is the guild paying you for referrals?”

“That’s a secret~”

Ichika grinned at her with a toothy smile. It looks like she just made a profit.

“Instructor, what did she mean about referrals?”

“I set up a thing with ’em to get people to do the training commissions for a small fee… ah, keep this secret from Goshujin-sama! Kay?”

“I understand, sir!”

Ichika, just when did you set up that advertising agreement?

Well, it’s not like I really mind her trying to earn some pocket money. She’ll probably just use it all on slots and food anyway.

*

So with all that, it looks like Shikina’s actually able to work as a waitress, but can she protect Ichika’s secret?

Note that I’d told Ichika to tell Shikina some secret and have her keep quiet about it to me.

As Shikina will be living with us for a while, her ability to keep a secret is something I’m wanting to confirm.

I need to know how much I have to hide from Shikina about the dungeon.

Well, I don’t exactly intend to tell her the secret even if she’s able to keep it, but it’s a matter about whether I’ll have to refrain from using the menu in the inn’s hallways. And I guess it’ll affect how we handle things if she finds out?

I called Shikina over to the lounge and asked her for a report of what she did today.

“Hey, Shikina. Is there something you’re hiding from me?”

“Something that I’m hiding?”

Shikina inclined her head and put her fingers to her lips.

“Umm, not really… oh, right. My panties today are white! Do you want to take a look?”

Saying that, Shikina unhesitatingly flipped up her skirt.

Yep, they’re white. Disappointing elf is disappointing.

“That’s not what I mean. Like if Ichika were keeping something from me… for instance.”

“Oh yeah, I didn’t report it because she said that it was a secret, but she told me something about referral fees!”

Shikina spilled the beans all too quickly.

She didn’t even try to hide it. What a talkative mouth she has.

“… Didn’t Ichika tell you to not say anything?”

“She did say that, but not going against your superior’s orders is common sense.”

“Wasn’t Ichika your superior?”

“You are the owner of authority here, Master Kehma. Therefore, Master Kehma’s word is law.”

I see, so she goes by rank.

For Shikina, everything’s divided by rank. You follow those above you.

She’s like a dog.

“By that standard, who is the topmost rank for you?”

“Sir! I have sworn my loyalty o my country, so that would be the emperor!”

“So if I told you a secret… and if the emperor ordered you to tell them, you would?”

“Sir! It is as you say!”

“If the emperor told you to kill civilians, would you?”

“Sir! I would kill them!”

Seriously? You could’ve hesitated at least a little.

That even causes me to pull back a little.

“Incidentally, every knight in the imperial knight orders are of the same heart! An imperial knight places orders above even friends and family.”

“… Heeh? Well, you’re not exactly a knight right now though.”

“M-my heart is still that of a knight!”

Yeah, I know. I have to hide everything related to the dungeon from Shikina.

By the way, I recall that there was a guy who tried to destroy the dungeon core despite knowing it would go against imperial orders. He was taken care of in the end, but there’s no way they’re all as united as Shikina said.

… At the very least, I should teach her enough so that she can keep secrets from those above her.

Right now she’s no different from a golem, unable to think about anything for herself—no, a golem’s actually better. A golem wouldn’t say something better left unsaid.

Right… let’s also have her learn how at least be ashamed or conceal herself enough that she’ll have some sex appeal to her.

Enough that there’ll be some noble who picks her up even if she can’t return to the knight order.

I established my policies on Shikina’s educational plan.