Nessa narrowed her eyes at Landon and then reached her foot out to kick him. He turned to her with surprise.
“Did you just kick me?” he asked.
Nessa stood up; Clara looked at her with concern.
“I’m getting a juice. Landon’s going to help me,” Nessa said.
“I could help you,” Clara offered, starting to get up.
“No,” Nessa said quickly. She reached down and grabbed Landon’s arm pulling him to his feet. “Landon’s going to help me this time.”
Clara sat back down with a look of confusion, but she nodded and turned back to the table.
“Come on,” Nessa said, pulling Landon from the table.
Landon went without hesitation, even as she pulled him out of the mess hall completely. Once they cleared the doors, Nessa stopped and turned to face him. She crossed her arms over her chest with a severe expression.
“No,” she said firmly. “Stop it.”
Landon furrowed his brows.
“Stop looking at Luna Fiona like that!”
Landon turned his gaze from her, but the soft smile on his lips made it clear she hadn’t misunderstood, and he knew exactly what she was talking about.
“Hey,” she said, “I’m serious. You can’t.”
Landon looked back at her. His smile fell, and his expression became concerned.
“I thought that you had no interest in anyone outside of your mate, and that was why you couldn’t return the feelings I had for you before,” he said. “But is it really that you find fault in my character, Nessa? Am I a bad man in your eyes?”
Nessa’s eyes widened.
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇt“No!” she said quickly. “Not at all! Landon, you are a great guy, and if I could have felt something for you back then, I absolutely would have. And I’m sure we would have had a happy life together because you are amazing.”
“Then why do you object to my interest in her?” he asked.
“I don’t!” she said. “Not really… I mean, it could get complicated. Leaders in different packs, the age difference… You are the same age as her son… that’s bound to be a little awkward.”
“Liara was much younger than Jonas,” Landon countered.
“True, but they were mates,” Nessa said, then shook her head. “This is so not the point.”
“What is the point?” He asked.
Nessa took a deep breath.
“You can’t look at her like that today,” she said. “You can’t flirt with her or give her come hither eyes today.”
Landon furrowed his brows, still not understanding the point that Nessa was trying to make.
“Today is her son’s vigil, Landon,” she said. “All these people are here to say goodbye to Alpha Caleb.”
Landon tilted his head. He knew it was a momentous day for all that were gathered, and most especially for Fiona. But he didn’t understand why that would prevent his desire to court her.
“Many bonds are blessed on the last day of mourning,” he replied softly.
Nessa closed her eyes and took a deep breath.
“In Broken Crag,” she sighed. “Not in Summer.”
“What is the difference?” he asked.
Nessa looked up at him. He wasn’t pouting or being unreasonable. He genuinely didn’t understand. She took a breath.
“We immerse ourselves in our loss,” she said, thinking of the three months she had spent in Broken Crag mourning her father. “We embrace the pain and let it tear us apart.”
There had been days when she could barely move. When Clara had sat on the floor with a wet cloth, wiping Nessa’s face and cleaning her body because she didn’t have the strength to do it herself.
“That is how we mourn,” she said. “By throwing ourselves into the pain until it doesn’t hurt anymore, and we can move forward.”
Landon nodded.
“But that’s not how they mourn,” Nessa said, nodding her head toward the door of the mess hall. “They avoid the pain, hold on to the hope that it’s all just a nightmare they can wake up from. They make themselves busy and think of anything except the loss they experienced.”
Landon swallowed and looked back toward the door. He had seen it already, the way that the strong and capable woman he had found interest in had ignored the pain she felt until it became a physical limitation.
“These vigils are the moment that they all dread. They say it is an honor and a moment for them all to remember and say goodbye. But really, it is the moment that they accept the loss. This is when all the pain they have held back comes lurching forward.”
Landon lowered his gaze to the floor and touched his chest. Under his clothing, there was a scar. During the mourning period, when his anguish had been at its height, he had been purposefully shot with an arrow. He wanted to experience Jonas's pain in his last moments.
He had been lucky not to die from the wound, but the pain and the brush with death had been what got him through his loss.
Landon swallowed and turned back to Nessa with a warm smile.
“Thank you,” he said. “As always, you still know more than me.”
Nessa chuckled and nodded.
They returned to the mess hall, making their way to the table. Landon could not help his glances and the attention he naturally paid to Fiona. Still, he did not approach or attempt to speak with her anymore. He could wait.
At least a few days.
***
The rest of the morning and afternoon proceeded without significant events or issues. As the sun began to set, the torches spread out all over Summer were lit while the pyre was built at the center of the gathering space.
Once the moon was out, the ceremony would begin. There would be memories and kind words, mementos added to the pyre. Songs and prayers, tears and laughter. Finally, the pyre would be lit.
The whole of Summer would stay and watch the flames until the last ember was gone.
“The sun has set,” Axel whispered, glancing out the window.
“We should head done to the pyre,” Alice said. “The moon will be out soon.”
Axel nodded and then swallowed.
“Do you think she made it?” he asked quietly.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmAlice smiled.
“You sounded so confident earlier,” she said.
Axel sighed.
“There were still hours in the day left earlier,” he said.
Alice wrapped her arms around his waist and leaned her head against his back.
“She’ll be here,” she whispered.
Axel took a deep breath and held her hands.
“How do you have more confidence than me?” he whispered with a laugh.
“I just—” Alice began, but her words were interrupted by a knock at the door.
Axel furrowed his brow.
“Are we expecting someone?” he asked, pulling away from her and moving toward the door.
Alice sniffed the air and smiled.
“Sort of,” she whispered.
Axel reached out and opened the door. His eyes widened when he saw her.
She wore traveling clothes, a pack over her shoulder, and her hair was almost dyed brown with dirt and dried blood mixed into it.
“Ashleigh!” he shouted.
Ashleigh lowered her head and held out her hands to him.
“Alpha Axel,” she whispered. “Please accept this stone and lay it in a place of honor.”
Axel furrowed his brows. He looked at her dirty palms, at the small stone in her hands. He swallowed and took it from her.
“Ashleigh, what is this?” he asked gently.
Ashleigh lifted her head, her eyes shone with tears, and a muddy streak ran down her cheeks.
“The final request of the scout that died because of me.”