Chapter 148: Someone Help Me Please!
*Ciana*
Blood pumped out around the knife, mixing with raindrops and smearing Theo’s skin with red. He
reached out to me and grabbed my arms, holding me close to him.
For reasons that I couldn't fathom, my heart started to ache. Tears started to stream down my cheeks,
but were washed away by the rain immediately. Theo was my enemy and I should be happy, but why
did I feel this way? Like the knife wasn't stabbed in his heart, but mine?
His eyes were wide. Confusion and worry flickered through them and I was captivated by his deep,
swimming orbs for a moment.
He should have been mad at me, furious at me, but his eyes were soft and unaccusing. I was waiting
for him to give me a deadly blow after my assassination attempt, but he didn't. Instead, he was trying to
pull me closer and comfort me like he thought I was going to be upset.
He just stared at me, his breathing heavy and sharp. He looked at me with such deep concern.
'Ciana... are... are you okay?" he gasped, reaching for my face.
“Why...?" I muttered.
Why did he care? I'd just stabbed him! He should hate me. He should be lashing out.
His utter lack of response had me frozen in place. I couldn't figure out what was going on with him.
The knife was sticking out of him pretty far, my fingers still curled around the blade, camping in place. It
might not have hit his heart all the way or he'd be dead. I'd have to shove it further in to end his life.
My mind screamed at me to finish it but I couldn't get my trembling hand to move any further. As much
as I willed it, my own body turned against me and refused to respond to my goal.
Suddenly, confusing memories burst through my mind.
“Do I love you?" I heard Theo say in my mind, "I love you more than life, Ciana."
I could almost see the turmoil of pain, care, desire and love in his dark eyes when he said it. No one
would ever doubt the sincerity of that pair of eyes and the weight of the words.
What was happening to me? I saw Luther reaching a hand out to me, caressing my cheek. Then the
memory flickered and it wasn't Luther in front of me, it was Theo. His touch was so gentle and loving. It
stirred powerful feelings inside of me.
However, with every piece of those memories that appeared in my mind, it was as if thousands of
vicious sharp claws were scratching inside my skull, trying to tear my brain into shreds.
I groaned in unbearable pain and squinted my eyes shut. It seemed the only way to alleviate the pain
was to stop the crazy memories that flooded me.
Then I saw the vision from the crystal again, how Theo had killed Luther. I saw Luther's hand
outstretched to me in the garden, how I'd taken it and felt so warm and so wrapped in love.
That's what I remembered of Luther.
And in my head, that was what Theo had taken away from me.
But my heart was breaking for a different reason. My heart was breaking because Theo was bleeding
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇtin front of me and I was trying to kill him!
How could I want something so badly in my head when my heart and the rest of my body revolted
against it?
My stomach curdled and I thought I was going to be sick.
More memories bombarded me and I didn't know what was true and what was made up anymore. Was
anything I remembered even real? Who and what should I trust in my own memories?
I saw an image of Theo smiling at me and even the image made my heart flutter.
But another voice in my head told me I wanted Luther. I wish for Luther from the very bottom of my
heart. He'd been so strong, even after so much had been taken from him.
That voice told me that I should kill Theo. He'd taken the love of my life away from me. I needed to
avenge Luther and I wanted Theo to feel the pain I'd felt when he killed the man I loved.
"You... you killed him...” I groaned.
"Ciana," he whispered my name.
I felt his fingertips on my cheek but I couldn't open my eyes.
More thoughts and feelings flashed through my mind. My heart was cracking into a million confused
pieces and if it wasn't wrapped in bandages, it would shatter and break completely.
"What's happening to me!?“ I screamed. My head felt like it was splitting in two.
I kept one hand on the knife and pressed the other to my temple, trying to stop the memories from
ripping me apart, literally.
Why was he worried about me? He was a coldhearted murderer that had killed Luther. He wouldn't
worry about me...
I opened my eyes, straining to see through the rain and the blinding pain that pounded against the
inside of my skull.
Theo's hands still held me tight and I stared at my own hands. The memories of Luther were growing
more and more distant in my mind.
Other memories began to take them over. I saw a sky with a crimson moon looming over me and I felt
like screaming in terror at that horrible, bleeding moon. The scream stuck in my throat and the pressure
in my head kept building.
There were two voices screaming at me in my head.
"Push the knife into his chest. Push it all the way in and end Theo! End the tyrant king!"
"No! Stop! Don’t hurt him! You don't want to hurt him! He means so much to you."
The two voices battled louder and louder, screaming at me. My vision blurred as the pain in my head
got stronger and stronger.
One voice started winning out over the other and I narrowed my eyes, glaring at him. The tyrant king.
"I'm going to kill you, Theo!" I snarled. I pulled away from him, ready to finish what I'd started.
"Ciana, look at me," Theo panted in a deep, soothing voice.
I froze, my body trembling at the tone of his voice. A large part of me wanted to fall back into his arms
and feel his strong embrace. I didn't know why, but he made me feel safe, even though he was a
murderer!
I locked eyes with him. My mind reeling, my hands trembling.
Theo's face was somber. "You have all of me, Ciana. You have my love, my heart, and my soul. If you
want my life... it is yours."
"Wh-what... why are you..."
I shook my head. Everything about him was off. He was supposed to be a menacing, horrible murderer
but he was forgiving me.
'Is this really what you want, Ciana?" he asked, breaking into my thoughts.
"Stop!" I screamed.
I burst into tears and pushed Theo away, letting go of the knife. It stuck out of his chest but he didn't try
to remove it either.
My legs trembled and gave out and I fell to my knees. Mud and water seeped into my clothes and
covered my legs. I saw traces of blood still mixed with the water and mud. How much blood had Theo
lost?
My head was still pounding and throbbing. I cradled my head in my hands, groaning and sobbing.
Luther. Theo. Theo. Luther.
Who was who? I could barely tell them apart anymore in my mind. There were nights I'd spent wrapped
in the arms of someone that loved me and that I loved too. Such warm, tender moments that couldn't
be replaced.
But who was it I spent them with? I couldn't put the pieces together and that terrified me so much! Was
there anything in this world that I could trust?
"Help me... who can help me... please..." I whimpered and slammed the heels of my hands into my
forehead. It didn't make the pain feel any better.
I tried to close my eyes tighter, hoping to block out the pain, but it didn't help.
"Please... do something... anyone..." I begged whoever was listening.
"Ciana!"
Theo's thick, deep voice cut through the rain and the pain. I opened one eye and saw him half-kneeling
in front of me. His blood was still gushing out and he could no longer support his own weight either.
Why wouldn't he just let me go?
I looked up into his face. It was blurry from the pain. He was only inches away but he felt so far away. It
felt if I reached out to him he'd float away or disappear. I waved my arm in front of my eyes, trying to
clear my vision.
My heart ached and I thought it would fall right out of my chest. I clutched my heart, feeling it thud
heavily against my chest like it was going to beat right out of my rib cage.
"Theo..." I gasped, unsure what to believe anymore.
Tears poured down my cheeks and dripped from my chin. I was soaked to the bone and I didn't know if
I'd soaked myself with my own tears or if it was the rain pouring down. I could hardly tell if it was raining
anymore or if I was just crying so much it still felt like it was raining.
Follow on Novᴇl-Onlinᴇ.cᴏmI heard a dull groan as Theo pulled the knife out from his chest. Blood rushed out.
I failed my mission. Strangely, the pain in my chest was relieved slightly. However, on the contrary, the
pain in my head was a hundred times worse.
I watched the blood as it streamed from the cut, around the blade, and then mixed with rain. Streaks
ran across his skin and through the mud. He looked paler than he had when he first showed up. Was
he losing too much blood or was he just cold?
"Ciana, you're okay..." He reached one of his hands to me, his voice faint. "Just don’t run away from me
anymore. I... I won't be able to..."
"STOP!" I screamed through the tears and the pain. "Don't... don't come over! I'm not okay! You're my
problem! You're living and breathing, that’s what's wrong with me!"
Theo chuckled darkly. His smile faded quickly and he took a deep shaking breath and grunted. He
leaned against the mansion wall. His entire body shuddered and it looked like he was going to collapse
on the ground completely.
He gripped the corner of the building and steadied himself but I could tell he was in pain. It was so
subtle. If I didn't know him well, I never would have seen it.
Did I know him that well?
"Listen to me, Ciana, no matter what, I don't blame you," Theo said.
I stared at him, trying to process what he said, but my mind was clouded and I couldn't seem to be able
to think straight. Then I heard other voices shouting at us through the rain.
"Ciana!?"
'King Theo!?"
My limbs felt like they weighed a thousand pounds. I thought I'd sink into the mud and get swallowed
up by the ground. Maybe that was what I deserved.
"Ciana, baby!"
A couple of new voices rang out, and I knew them. I just couldn't recall who they were.
Blinking several times, I glanced around to see two familiar faces approaching.
“Mommy?" I asked in a small, fragile and uncertain voice. "...Daddy?"
"Ciana!" the woman I believed to be my mother gasped, her eyes wide as she stared at me and Theo.
"What did you do?"
"I..."
"It's okay, sweetheart, it’s okay," the man who I believed to be my father said. He came up beside me
and leaned down, looping his arm around my shoulder.
"Help... please..." I gasped. I'd do anything to stop the throbbing that was about to tear me apart. "It
hurts so much..."
I saw his eyes dart to Theo, full of questions. Theo just shook his head and nodded toward me.
Whatever that meant, my father seemed to understand.
"Kill... please... Daddy, help me..." I mumbled.
"Sweetheart, it’s okay," my mother cried as she cupped my face. Then I saw her and my father
exchange a look and she nodded her approval.
The next second, something heavy hit the back of my head.
The world around me shut down immediately and I was never so grateful for whoever did that to save
me from my miserable agony and heartbreak.