Being too self-conscious was something everyone would experience more times than they thought in their life. It concerned one’s confidence, after all. If you did something that would plummet that confidence down. Oftentimes, the one experiencing it would suffer from it. Furthermore, it was even more emphasized to an overthinker.
That’s how it was for me before. Despite my shamelessness, it didn’t become an exception.
And today, it manifested in Komoe. Even though she declared that she’d be fine earlier, upon nearing the school gates wherein a wave of students had started to arrive, the girl instinctively hid behind me to avoid her classmates’ eyes.
Miura-senpai helped me to try and calm her down but to no avail. Soon, it even got worse when we finally reached the School Building.
Even though none of the students were pointing at her, Komoe’s mind was in a mess, believing that they were. She stuck to my back, not daring to look at anyone else. And due to this, we got stuck in the shoe locker area.
“Komoe.” I tried calling out to the girl but she couldn’t even utter words to reply. She’s already trying to escape from this reality by covering her eyesight and clinging to me while inhaling my fragrance. Given how close she was, I could sense her racing heartbeat out of nervousness. Her skin was turning cold and she was starting to tremble from it.
Miura-senpai looked on worriedly but she was just as helpless as me with this situation. I could think of one solution to this but that means… I would have to spend more time with the girl.
Judging that she might really break down if this continued, I turned to Miura-senpai. “Senpai, I’ll be bringing Komoe to the infirmary. Maybe, I can calm her down there. I’m afraid that she might collapse if I still leave her behind in their classroom when she’s like this.”
“Is that so? Then do you want me to accompany you?”
“No. It’s fine. I think the nurse will be there. Maybe she can also help.”
Well, even if she’s the owner of this school, Hayashi-sensei was still a nurse. Plus, she might be able to inspire this girl. Who knows?
Just that, it got me a little apprehensive when I remembered every trip I had to the infirmary. The most recent one was with Izumi-senpai. If not for Ogawa, the two of us could’ve gone further.
Follow on NovᴇlEnglish.nᴇt“Okay, take care of my sister, Onoda-kun. I’ll also check on her later during breaks.”
With this, I grabbed Komoe’s hand to not lose her in this crowd of students and turned around to leave the school building.
On our way out, attention was already gathered around us. I even spotted some familiar faces but I had no time to mind them. Besides, I specifically put on my Disciplinary Officer armband. In this way, the others would be able to associate this situation with my job. Which is true, in a sense.
Without anyone slowing us down, we soon reached the infirmary. I slid the door open and entered.
Unfortunately, Hayashi-sensei was nowhere to be found.
Thinking about it, she might still be in her office. Hana was supposed to transfer today. If that girl was already here, she’d be waiting there before she gets picked up by a homeroom teacher to be introduced to the class.
Well, Shio still has no clue if the girl will be allocated to our class but considering I haven’t heard from her aside from our morning greeting, she must be already busy with it.
Anyway, that’s just my assumption. For now, I led Komoe inside and sat her down on one of the infirmary beds.
Like always, the whole room was filled with the scent of disinfectant. Perhaps noticing that, Komoe finally left the darkness and opened her eyes. She looked up at me with a complicated expression.
“Ruki… I’m sorry. I thought I could… do it but I saw him earlier. I panicked, thinking that he will laugh if he sees me.”
I see. So, it’s not just her being too self-conscious. The reason why she stopped going to school was the first one of her classmates that she noticed. It probably triggered her memory of that day.
I crouched down in front of her, grabbing her cold hand as well as caressing her stiff cheek.
Perhaps feeling the warmth from my touch, her tenseness dissipated slightly.
Looking into her eyes, I noticed her faraway look as though she was still lost in her thoughts, overthinking about what was going to happen in her return to class.
“Hey, I don’t know that guy and I clearly have no idea how he will act around you after what happened back then. However, Komoe, do you still remember what I told you?”
As I raised that question, the girl’s eyes focused on me and then slowly moved her head. “… Yes. You said that it’s not my loss but his for turning me down.”
“That’s right. With someone as pretty as you, he’s the one losing out on becoming friends with you. Although you still have to tone down that overthinking of yours, I know that you’re fine as you are.”
I moved my hand from her cheek to gently part the fringes covering her forehead. Fixing her hair like this, the girl’s appearance truly got a little boost.
To begin with, she’s truly already pretty and attractive enough. However, the girl was probably like a mirror of myself. She’s not that much of an enthusiast when it comes to presenting herself better.
“You’re just trying to comfort me, Ruki.”
“There you go again. Have I lied to you before?”
“No…” The girl pursed her lips. She probably had more to say but decided not to mention it anymore.
“There you have it. Look, you can’t always run away from him. You’re in the same class, after all. But you can also ignore his presence. We talked about this before and I reminded you about this earlier… You’re your own person. Whatever they say, if you keep on being yourself, no one can put you down.”
“I… understand.” Although with slight difficulty, the girl eventually accepted it, and slowly, her confidence and resolve started to return.
“Do you?”
“I should ignore them, right?”
“Well, that’s the gist of it. I know you can do it… Even if your friends started avoiding you, you still have me.”
Upon saying this, I once again cupped her cheek and put on a genuine smile. I squeezed her hand gently, tightening my grip on it.
Soon enough, a relaxed smile devoid of her worries peeked from the girl’s lips.
“Uhm… I think I can go to our classroom now, Ruki.”
“Are you sure? You know, we can stay here for a little longer. Just until before the start of the 1st period. That way, you won’t encounter them outside.”
Not that I didn’t believe her. However, since my original plan was to stay here until the student traffic became less as the 1st period approached, I could further temper her mind so that she’d be fully prepared later.
Komoe nodded, agreeing to my suggestion.
A while later, I sat down next to her, proceeding with that plan. For the next fifteen minutes or so, Komoe was already back to normal. Hopefully, it stays that way…
As we were about to leave the infirmary, Komoe pulled on my hand, preventing me from standing up. She then climbed up on my lap and circled her arms to the back of my neck before pressing her forehead on mine.
I thought she was going in for the kiss. I was ready to stop her. However, that didn’t happen.
Instead, the girl affectionately stared at me and whispered in a voice filled with gratitude, “I’m glad you’re the one the school sent to bring me back… I’ll do my best. I mean it this time!”
“Mhm. Make me proud, Komoe.” I whispered back as my arms wrapped around her waist, hugging her closely.
Without saying anything more, the two of us simply stared at each other, waiting for the time to pass. Well, this was certainly a daring position. Nonetheless, seeing how she’s very comfortable in it, I decided to just give this moment to her.
When we separated and left the infirmary a few minutes later, Komoe confidently strode out of the Administration Building. She didn’t need to hide behind me anymore so I could only follow her and escort her to their classroom.
“What? You all look like you’ve seen a ghost.” While wearing a smirk, Komoe loudly said as she made her way inside, ignoring the silence and flabbergasted expressions of her classmates.
Before sitting down on her chair, the girl glanced back at me and made a peace sign.
Mhm. Looks like there’s no need to worry about her anymore. Good for her.