The Protagonists Are Murdered by Me

This world, for some reason, flows according to the taste of the protagonist, Kaido. No, to be precise, the common sense of the world itself had been changed according to Kaido’s level of knowledge. For example,

“Ah, this is called ‘Fruit Shaved Ice’. It’s a common dessert in my world.”

“Woaah!! This is delicious! It’s the first time I’ve eaten such a soft ice!”

In this world, there’s ice and ice cream, but for some goddamn reason that my head can’t wrap around, there’s no shaved ice. Does that even make sense? There should be billions of people in this world, how come anyone not think of making shaved ice so far? It’s not a complicated menu, either. You just need to shave it, for god’s sake.

“If you make a backrest for the chair, everyone’s back will be more comfortable.” ( “Can’t you just add more part on the back of the chair to make people could rest their back on it?”)

“Oh My God. That’s the discovery of the century! Kaido, you are amazing!”

There were all kinds of chairs crafted here in this world, but guess what? A chair with a backrest has never been invented.

“If there’s a food shortage, you can just catch fish.”

“Why fish?”

“To eat it of course! This one is called sushi. In our world, it is a staple food.”

“WOW! Amazing! This is my first time tasting something like this! It’s not even roasted, but it’s such an incredible taste…”

Their reaction was more explosive than those westerners who never had raw fish before…

“Are you having trouble because you have a lot of coins? Wouldn’t it be better to make additional coin denominations like 10 gold coins and 100 gold coins?”

“You are right! It’s such a simple way, but it’s an amazing shift in thinking! As the Princess of the Empire, I will proceed with this agenda right away.”

Surprising, right? I wonder where our protagonist had such brilliant ideas from when literally every genius in this world couldn’t figure that out…

“You’re starving because you don’t have rice? Then you can make bread and eat it.”

“Oh oh!!!! What a wonderful food!!!”

At this point, Aracelli finally got fed up and spoke to me with a face full of displeasure. “Will the world stay like this forever?”

“The common sense of this world will return to normal once we kill him.”

The protagonist this time around was quite unique and held a very special ability. Throughout my journey to various worlds, I could proudly say that I had met a wide spectrum of protagonists who had a cheat-like ability such as, a protagonist who created the world itself and the protagonist who could turn back time infinitely. But it was my first time meeting a protagonist who had an ability to lower the IQ of everyone around him.

What’s even scarier was that his power didn’t just change the common sense of the people, but also the common sense of the ‘setting’ of the world itself.

Does it make sense that there was a chair, but a backrest was never invented?

Lightning magic exists, and for hundreds of years, knights had always been unaffected by it even though they were always wearing steel armor. Does it make any sense?

This world culinary level was at the level where they already cook food with grains. But bread wasn’t even invented?

And throughout this wide world which had many kingdoms, their currency had only one denomination?

However, all of that wasn’t crazy enough to make me quake in my boots. The one who got me scared was the fact that his skill could even affect how magic was perceived in this world.

In every world, magic was a science. It was a branch of science which was needed in order to know the principles of the world. Only after understanding the principles and studying them for a long time, can someone use it. But here, it was not even a study. It was just a flashy technique to kill enemies. In other words, a skill. Which means, his skill was powerful enough to turn the reality of the world into fantasy.

The reason was probably because Kaido perceives that ‘magic’ was nothing but an attack skill. His skill, [Common Sense (SSS+)] was such a terrifying skill that it literally blurred the line between imagination and reality.

But… was his skill really all-rounder? It was just a skill which could affect the common sense towards what the protagonist knew. But there should be a disadvantage.

And after following Kaido as his cheerleader for the past few days, I was able to discover one weakness of his skill.

“We will use ‘dust explosions’ in this battle.”

“Dust … explosion …?”

“Yeah. With it, we can take on many enemies with a very small amount of mana.”

“What is that?!”

Without explaining further, Kaido took out a white powder from his bag. It was none other than flour.

“Spread this in the air, and with just a small amount of flame, we can create a huge explosion.”

“Really!?!? Is it really possible to do it with just flour and flame magic?”

“Of course.”

After a while, many reaction vending machines around Kaido sang his name accompanied with praises. They would literally put those internet buzzers on Earth to shame with their words.

Not long after, the battle started. And as expected, Kaido succeeded in annihilating the enemy by simply throwing a flick of ember after scattering the flour into the air.

“Oh my god!!! I thought we would never win this battle! To think we win with just one magic and without any casualties…!”

“This is such incredible knowledge… Kaido-kun, you are really…”

Looking at the scene, Aracelli, who was standing beside me, clicked her tongue.

“It really doesn’t make sense…”

“Is that so?”

From the start, there was no way that the particles of combustible solid matter could maintain a higher concentration than the air’s lower explosion limit when it’s such a windy day.

Even in the case of favourable weather, the flour particles should not scatter evenly. But let’s say such a thing did happen. The particles would have ignited all on their own already from radiant friction of the sun without the need for a spark.

(T/N This bit is translated by J.kay, translator for ‘Introduction To The Survival Theory’. Go and check his work, guys!)

“…” I don’t know what it was, but I know that Aracelli meant that Kaido’s dust explosion was just ridiculous. However, since Kaido sincerely believed that that method would work, such an explosion actually happened.

That was Kaido’s weakness. He had common sense… but it was at best, below the average level. If I was being kind, his thoughts were too pure. And if I being frank, he’s just stupid. He simply believed that his knowledge was real because it happened without thinking what made it happen.

Kaido’s deceptive ability only activated when he believed his thoughts were ‘real’. And thanks to his lacking knowledge, his imagination became rich, which gave him an advantage in manipulating the principles of this world.

It was not a glaring weakness, but somehow, I thought that I could use that part to kill him.

* * *

Yoo Seodam and Aracelli went on an adventure with Kaido and the others. However, when they stopped in a particular small town, they became aware that the town was currently preparing for a monster raid. Obviously, this cliché development was happening because of ‘protagonist correction’.

If it was something out of the Korean genre, the protagonist would say, ‘There is no benefit to gain by helping them, just ignore it and let’s move to the next town.’ But since this world follows the genre of the country across the sea which was famous for their kindness, the protagonist Kaido, of course, said yes when ‘Overly Kind-Hearted Girl’ Elizabeth said ‘We need to help those in danger!’.

His kindness is indeed good. Though, it was only in the eyes of other people. Yoo Seodam and Aracelli, who were aware of the way of the world, could only felt sorry towards the residents of the town who would eventually lose their lives just to make Kaido shine even brighter even though the attack of those monsters was due to the protagonist in the first place,

“If you exclude the elderly, young children, and young children in the village, there are only 120 available troops. Even amidst those numbers, those with combat experience are only half of them. However, it is said that the number of monsters reaches 3300. It is a battle that can never be won!”

The city was located in the middle of plains… Yoo Seodam really itched to ask the one who briefed them why he didn’t choose to fight the battle on the plain far away from the town rather than holing up in the city, but in the end, he decided not to.

“It’s fine. I came up with a ‘strategy’ to win.”

“Pardon? It’s already hopeless, no strategy would be able to help us to win!” The man said once again.

“Is that so? According to my strategy, there is a 99% chance of winning.”

After saying that, everyone in Kaido’s surroundings began to stir. They were all questioning Kaido over and over again as if they were a kid. Then Kaido unfolded a map, put it on the wall, and explained the strategy by pointing it with something like a baton.

“Because there is only one way to get to town, the enemies would undoubtedly move through this way. And because we already know the enemy’s movement, we can use it against them.”

“Then?”

“We will ‘siege’ the enemy.” Kaido pounded the map and smiled.

“Ha, but…we are most likely to be defeated before we can even besiege them!”

“Perhaps so, If we just go there like this.” After saying that, Kaido looked around the villagers. “The soldiers of this town have limited mobility because they wear heavy armor. But what if… you take off your armor?”

At Kaido’s words, one soldier took off his armor. His eyes instantly widened in surprise. “I… I see… Without the armor, I can move faster!”

“That’s right. The key to this operation is speed! We take off our armor and move as quickly as possible to besiege our enemies. That is the core of this operation, the ‘quick siege’. And as long as you encircle the enemies… you’ll understand what will happen without me telling you, right?”

“That’s right!! The besieged enemy will be defeated and annihilated!”

By the way, amongst people who were currently in the city, for some reason there was a prince from a neighboring country who became friends with Kaido, and there’s also a princess who loves swords and had been living on the battlefield since childhood. As royalty, they were said to be adept at warfare, but Yoo Seodam couldn’t help but facepalm and sigh at their response at Kaido’s suggestion.

“What a great plan! There has never been a strategy like this in history!”

“It’s a strategy I’ve never even read in a book…”

“Ah, we are witnessing the moment when history is being written…”

“Then let’s leave immediately!” Kaido said. Voice brimming with confidence.

(T/N I know guys, you want to just punch your monitor, don’t you? Trust me, I also want to do it as much as you did when I translated this chapter…)

(E/N: I had a hard time editing it because it was so fckn dumb)

(P/N Please… I’m dying of cringe…)

Soon, the operation began. At the moment when the demons and monsters were about to climb the mountain and descend to the plain, the soldiers moved quickly and began to surround them from all directions. And surprisingly, or maybe not, the ‘quick siege’ strategy hatched by Kaido succeeded.

The battle then began, and the 120 human troops began to overwhelm the far more physically superior demons just because they had surrounded them.

At that moment, Kaido looked down at the battlefield with a satisfied expression.

Yoo Seodam made eye contact with Aracelli and slowly opened his mouth.

“…Kaido-san. Enemy monsters are obviously physically superior to humans, aren’t they?”

“Huh? That’s a reasonable thing to say. But we are still able to beat them through my strategy!”

“Yes… By the way, Kaido-san, about your strategy… I have a question.”

“Tell me.” Kaido said. A little hint of displeasure could be found in his voice.

“The number of monsters is about 3,300. Assuming that each monster occupies an average of 1 square meter of space, and all the monsters are politely attached to each other and fill the space in a circle, with 3,300 monsters, the circumference of the circle exceeds 200m.”

“So?”

“It means that 120 soldiers can barely block all 3,300 even if they stand about 1m apart…”

“Huh?” Kaido brows furrowed. The words Yoo Seodam told him was the part he hadn’t thought about in detail until now. After all, why did he have to think about it when he was certain it would be a resounding success?

“That much gap between the soldiers is large enough for at least one enemy to pass through… In this case, does the word ‘siege’ have any meaning?”

“No, if you surround the enemy anyway…”

“Even if we disregard that gap problem, wouldn’t it be difficult for our soldiers to hold on because they were fighting against monsters who are physically superior to us, humans, without wearing any armor?”

“…”

Kaido’s [Common Sense (SSS+)] skill, or a skill that could easily be called Reality Manipulation, was really a cheat. However, it had one major drawback. That was, if you know a lot, you wouldn’t be able to use it.

Once the illusion inside Kaido’s head was disturbed by feeding him the principle behind the result in detail such as ‘Even if these and these things tried to become reality, it doesn’t make sense scientifically or mathematically, or even logically…’, it would no longer be usable.

[The effect of Kaido’s skill ‘Common Sense (SSS+)’ has weakened.]

“Aww!”

“Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!”

Suddenly, the situation on the battlefield turned 180 degrees. The demons and monsters easily tore the human troops which were 1m apart from each other and started to charge towards the town. Kaido’s colleagues were no exception. Although they had strong powers since they were the protagonist’s companions, it was simply impossible to deal with thousands of monsters at once.

“Ka… Kaido! Hey, how did this happen…!”

“Ackkkkk!”

“Sa, save me…!”

Kaido then quickly began to deny the reality which happened in front of him.

“No, no, no…. In the world I lived in, there are clearly cases where a small number of troops defeated a larger number of troops…!”

“I believe there’s many examples of that. However, in every of those examples, there’s many factors which made it successful, such as the extreme weather, the terrain and obstacles such as cliffs or trenches, or a surprise attack at night. But right now, we are in the middle of broad daylight, the battlefield is flat, and the weather is clear. We don’t have any strategic advantage.”

“Ugh…!”

The moment the human army realized that it was impossible to defeat the demons, everything was already over. Most of the troops, who jumped in believing Kaido’s irresponsible strategy, were dying, and his comrades were also bleeding and screaming his name, asking for help.

“Huh! Since it’s become like this… I have no choice but to step forward…!”

In the end, Kaido clenched his teeth and raised his hand which had a fire wrapped on it. Unfortunately, the protagonist hunter, Yoo Seodam, just wasn’t the type of person who would just let his prey recover his strength.

After exchanging glances with Yoo Seodam, Aracelli touched Kaido’s shoulder and opened her mouth.

“Kaido-san, do you know that the flame burning in your hand was the result of burning mana instead of oxygen? So…” Aracelli proceeded to explain to Kaido in depth about the basic principles behind his fire spell.

Hearing her words, Kaido’s complexion turned paler and paler. And not long after, his spell disintegrated into the air. The monsters, who felt Kaido’s magic, were charging at him in droves. However, even knowing that, Kaido was unable to use any magic which could turn the situation around. After all, in the tug of war between imagination and reality, his imagination was defeated.

“Oh, that can’t be… I’m right… I, I, I…!”

No matter how much he shouted ‘Fire Ball’, not even a spark was generated. The same was true for other magic. It was because, everytime he tried to use magic, Aracelli always fed him up with the reason why ‘magic was practically impossible’, and it kept holding back Kaido’s ankles.

‘How can you create a flame when there is nothing to burn in the air?’

‘Did you know how many calories you need to just generate a few volts of electricity?’

‘To create that much water in the air, an enormous amount of hydrogen is required. But if the enormous amount of hydrogen was in the air in the first place, where did the oxygen go? Wouldn’t it suffocate us to death?”

Because Kaido had half-baked knowledge of the modern world, the more he listened to Aracelli, the more he realized just how impossible magic was from the scientific point of view. Though, it was something which could be solved if he had any magical knowledge. But because he was completely ignorant of it, the thought ‘impossible’ stuck in his head, and the impossible soon became a reality.

‘Why…!’

Boom, boom!!

Monsters were charging towards him. Meanwhile, the companions who were supposed to help him whenever he was on the verge of death were nowhere to be found. It seems that they have already been swept away by the monster’s ruthless charge.

“Let’s go. We have to save the civilians and the others.” Yoo Seodam said in a cold tone. He no longer paid any attention to Kaido whose death was written in stone even if Seodam did not do anything to him.

“Ugh, ah, ah, sa, save me!!”

After that, Kaido, who had finally faced the reality in front of him, screamed. But his scream fell on deaf ears because there was no one here that was alive except for the monsters.

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