Tondemo Skill de Isekai Hourou Meshi

Chapter 355: Obtaining Personnel

“Hello there, can I help you?”

“Ah, it’s the old man, I mean… Hi, big brother!”

The one speaking was the leader boy, I think his name was Lewis, of the orphanage party. [5]

[8] “Well, what is it?” I said. A little curt since I do not appreciate being called ‘old man’ accidentally or not.

“See, we have a request.”

“A request?”

“Yeah, you see [4] when we got back to the orphanage yesterday with the wooden ‘bats’ you made for us, well, some of the others made a big fuss about it and wanted one…” [5]

“And… you told them you got those bats from me?” I said, raising an eyebrow.

[8] “Sorry, big brother. I’ve told them again and again not to cause trouble for you but they just refuse to listen,” said Lewis with an apologetic look on his face.

[6] … This brat, I’m sure there had to be more to the story, but I can’t fault him for trying to do his best for his friends. Level 1 of the meat dungeon might be relatively safe, but it was still a dungeon after all.

“Fine, I understand. But how did you know where to find me?”

“Oh, it doesn’t take much. There’s a rumour around town about an S Rank Tamer showing up suddenly. I mean, I had no idea that my big brother is such a famous guy! You don’t look like an S Ranker at all!”

Oi, you don’t have to add that last bit. [5]

I sighed, “I see, no, wait. You know what? Just come in first. I don’t want you guys leaning on my fence like this. I can’t enjoy my food properly.”

“Awesome~! You heard him! My big brother says we can go in! By the way, something smells really good in here. Right, everyone?”

At Lewis’ prompting, the youths all nodded. They turned their shining eyes at me. [6] Wait, I think the shine was from their drool…

“Yes, yes, I understand. Well, come in first,” the moment I opened the door, the youths stampeded in and made a beeline for the barbecue stove. [5]

[6] I guess it’s a sign of their restraint for not leaping at the barbecue grill…

Not that there was anything to leap at since all the offal on the grill had been eaten up. It was actually time to put the next round of offal onto the net.

While I’m willing to share food, the orphans’ glittering eyes reminded me of hungry beasts. I really don’t think I have enough food… Moreover, offal takes a lot of effort to prepare… [5]

Hmm?

Ohohoho.

A great idea just occurred to me! [5]

[9]

“Ahem, would you like some meat?”

All the boys and girls nodded furiously at me.

“I can let you have some, however…”

[6] A cheer interrupted me and the kids charged at the empty barbecue stove again. Wait, there’s nothing on it… ah, they found the basins of raw intestines…

“Hey, hey, wait a second!” I had to block them with my body. “Hold up, there are conditions.”

“What is it, big brother? Can’t you tell us after you feed us?” Lewis grumbled.

I gestured at the empty grill, “What exactly are you going to eat here?”

[9]

“Awww…”

“Anyway, I’m not feeding you for free. You of all people should know the worth of dungeon meat. However, I am willing to let you eat if you help me out with something, how’s that sound?”

“…what’s the condition?” Lewis folded his arms, he sounded wary but his eyes kept moving towards the grill.

How cute, it’s good to see him trying hard not to be lured by good food and protect his friends.

“It’s nothing too difficult,” I said, showing them the basin of offal. “These are large and small intestines of Dungeon Cows and Pigs.”

“What, eww, wait. Are you sure that’s what we’ve been smelling?”

“Fufufu, I’m sure you’re sceptical,” I said. “I will be grilling these for my familiars and you can decide whether you want to eat once they’re done. However, once you eat them…”

Gulp.

“Uh, so, what do you want us to do?”

“You will help clean and process offal meat for me,” I said mildly. “Well? Sounds like a good deal?”

“Erm, sure,” Lewis looked at his companions. “We’re okay doing some cleaning job, right?”

“Yeah!!”

“Nice,” I said. “Hold on, I’m going to place the meat on the grill first.”

Under the kids’ watchful eyes, I covered the barbecue grill with pieces of offal before opening up my [Item Box]. While the meat was sizzling away, I took out sets of plates and forks. There were 21 kids here, so 21 sets were taken out and handed to Lewis to pass to his friends.

“Right, it’s going to take some time…”

[9]

“Oi! Don’t forget we’re eating too!” [3] Fer suddenly spoke up.

“Woah, the giant wolf just talked!”

“Amazing! I’ve never seen a talking wolf!”

“It’s my first time too!”

The orphans were more excited than afraid to encounter a talking wolf. I guess they probably did not know that Fer was a Legendary Beast Fenrir. [5]

They were also interested in Dora-chan and Sui.

Even so, once the meat was done grilling… [5]

“Time to eat~” I called.

Suddenly, the kids abandoned Fer, Sui and Dora-chan to surround the barbecue grill. My familiars were stunned to be thrown aside for food.

Ahaha.

[6] “Alright, everyone. Form a line,” I called. “It’s hot, so it could be dangerous. Form a line, people.”

[6] “You heard big brother,” said Lewis. “Form a line as we do at the orphanage.”

[6] With some reluctance, the kids formed a line. I placed different parts of grilled offal meats on their plates along with a generous helping of rice and sauce for the 21 kids before serving Fer and the others.

“Muu, to think those brats would abandon us for food,” muttered Fer as he chomped at his plate of rice and offal.

[6] Fer… you’re the last person with the right to complain. Who was the one who became the familiar of a Level 1 weakling for the sake of food?

Meanwhile, the children were busy chewing on their portion of offal and rice.

“The texture is a bit weird, but it tastes good!”

[6] “It’s really fragrant too~”

[5] “I used to think that those soft flabby things we get are bad stuff, but they’re really good!”

“I still think it’s a bit weird…”

[6] “I’m fine as long as it’s meat~”

[10]

From how fast the meat and rice were disappearing, I could tell there won’t be enough offal to go around. Therefore, after putting more offal onto the grill, I took out regular Dungeon Pork and Beef and began to prepare them to feed today’s unexpected guests.

For the beef, I plan to just grill them as large steaks over a strong fire with salt and pepper before placing the steaks under foil paper to rest. As for the excellent pork, I decided to give it a little extra attention.

Let’s try making the special Korean style BBQ Pork Belly. Incisions were pre-cut into long strips of pork belly for more even cooking. This will allow me to cook both pork and beef on the same fire without worries of undercooking or overcooking anything.

The sauce for the pork belly was my favourite yakiniku sauce with a bit of spicy kimchi juice.

Sure enough, the beef steaks charred quickly over the hot charcoal and then placed under foil paper to cook in its residual heat. The pork belly was done quickly too and all I had to do next was follow the pre-cut incisions to separate the meat into bite-size pieces. After cutting up the pork, I sliced the steaks and drizzled steak sauce over the beef.

“Right, everyone come up with your plates!”

This time, I served the regular Dungeon Pork and Beef with bread and shredded cabbage. Higher species dungeon meat would be too luxurious for the orphans, so regular Dungeon Pork and Beef would do.

Even so, the children gobbled up the meat as though there was no tomorrow.

Goodness, please have some restraint…

Please read this at dot com ~

“Phew~ That was incredible~” [3] Lewis rubbed his tummy with a satisfied look on his face.

“I’m so full~”

“This is the first time I get to eat as much meat as I like, it’s paradise~”

“That was really delicious.”

“Haahhh~~”

I have 21 children sprawled around the garden, all patting their bulging stomachs with satisfaction.

“Ahem, after a short break, be sure to help me out as you’ve promised!”

““ ““ ““ Ehhh!!!”” ”” ””

The children stared up at me, dismay on their faces.

“What ‘ehhh’? We have a deal, didn’t we? You’ve already eaten your fill so it’s only fair to repay me with your labour.” [5]

“Well, it can’t be helped,” Lewis rolled to his feet. “A deal is a deal.” [5]

“I guess he’s right.”

“It can’t be helped…”

“I get to eat all the meat I want, so it’s only fair…”

Fuhahahaha!

I have the manpower needed to help me process the offal. [5]

Time to work, kiddos!

[Gumihou: Lol, it’s actually good for the kids too since they will learn how to process these ‘bad meat’ and improve their diet.]

[1] Structural Change: Combine 2 paragraphs

[2] Structural Change: Combine 3 paragraphs

[3] Structural Change: Combine paragraph & dialogue

[4] Structural Change: Change passive sentence to dialogue

[5] Delete Repetitive or Pointless Information

[6] Additional Information for Aesthetic Purpose

[7] Add Dialogue Tag

[8] Creative Licence Taken – Dialogue between Lewis and Mukouda-san. Actually, just the interactions in general.

[9] Logistics of Mukouda feeding the kids. Especially since he said the meat had already been eaten and the grill is empty. Also, barbecue takes time, so it makes sense to put the meat on the grill, capture the kids’ attention and then make the conditions.

Also, Fer’s reaction was a bit too mild.

Also, Lewis’ reaction was too childish and not wary enough for a leader of wanna be Adventurers.

[10] Recipe for barbecue pork and beef. No, you can’t just slap it on the grill and yay it to existence.

I imagine that’s what the Japanese think ‘Korean BBQ Pork Belly’ is supposed to look like. I stayed in a Korean Town in Tokyo for a while and all the posters featured the pork belly with beautiful pre-cut incisions.