NovelEnglish"So, where exactly are we headed first?" | ask the group as they move in silence in front of me. Nisha groans in
annoyance, picking up her pace, Koda following along behind her like a love struck puppy. "Great, good talk." |
mutter to myself. "She will caround eventually," Marcos says, popping up on my right. He givesa gentle
smile that makes my cheeks blush and | shake my head, hiding my grin. "I enjoyed spending twith you last
night." | chuckle and nod. "Yeah, the silence was nice."
His eyes squint slightly and his mouth quirks up at the edges, the light sound of laughter tumbling freely from
him like he is unaffected by his past. A pang of jealousy twinges in my chest and | look away, tucking a loose
strand of hair behind my ear. "I was thinking more about the nice wrestling match." He winks and | bark out a
laugh, giving him a shove as he leans away.
"Way to make it sound less like you getting your ass kicked and more like it was planned." | tease him.
"I mean, call it what you want. I'm happy to do it again whenever you'd like."
Oh, Marcos is a flirt. A damn good flirt, but for once, it feels nice to be seen for more than a history | had. Either
with Tyler or Hayes.
"No relationships in the group." Hayes growls, a glare sharp enough it could puncture even a dragon's hide. My
spine tingles as his scent hits my nostrils and | want to gnaw my heart out just to keep it from feeling anything
for him. "Define relationships?" | say with a sarcastic lip twitch. "Because I'm not looking for a new mate, just
maybe someone to pass the tuntil | inevitably die in battle."
It's a lie. I'm not looking for anyone or anything to helppass the time. But the way Hayes' glare turns
annoyed to homicidal is well worth the little lie. A little part offeeds off seeing the emotions play across his
face that he can't control. "Don't fuck around." He clarifies, trying to coff as intimidating, but all it does is
thrillall too much that he cares at all.
"What about just fucking? Is that okay?" | ask, sending a wink to Marcos, who clears his throat and scratches the
back of his neck.
"Well damn, | wasn't expecting you to be that forward—"
"No. You can not fuck Marcos. Or Koda, or Dean, or Nisha." He says, his voice growing loud but not quite yelling
yet.
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"What about you then?" Marcos asks, a defiant look in his eyes as he stops and goes toe to toe with Hayes.
Hayes blinks slowly, his shoulders rolling back as he rises to his full height. He stands two inches taller than
Marcos before he leans forward, his lips in a sneer.
"If she needs to fuck anyone, she can use her damn fingers and her imagination." He snaps out, but his eyes
shift toand | can see a look there that makes my eyebrows raise and my mouth go dry.
"Interesting." Marcos mutters, taking a step back, a mischievous grin on his lips. "So She is off limits, is that what
you are saying?"
"Yes." he bites out before he seems to rear back. "I mean no. Just no sex among the crew."
"Other than Nisha, who can just freely crawl into anyone's tent she pleases?" Marcos challenges.
Bile burns at my throat, the jealousy twisting through my stomach painfully at the thought of Hayes with her.
"It's fine, Marcos." | say, clearing my throat of the acid and hurt. "No sex, fine."
I turn on my heels and walk off, realizing | set myself up for this pain in my chest. Where | aim to anger and
annoy Hayes, | only end up causing myself more pain in the long run.
The pain of hating myself for thinking of someone other than Tyler and the pain of hating Hayes for not feeling
the bond and the usual self hatred for not being strong enough to forgo any of it.
| catch up to Dean, who looks mildly surprised to seeat his side. Neither of us say anything. Why would we
when we have nothing to discuss? But | must admit, the lack of hostility and flirtatious looks is a relief I didn't
think | would find.
Marcos storms past us, muttering curses under his breath, and Dean looks atcuriously. | shrug and shake my
head, telling him | have no idea what it's about either, and he turns to look back. | follow his gaze, glimpsing an
angry-looking Hayes, hands stuffed in his pockets as he looks around.
| look back forward before he has the chance to catchpeeking at him. Dean then lets out a heavy sigh and
givesa sympathetic look before he increases his walking speed.
My eyes grow large in shock, trying
to keep up as he clearly tries to ditch
me. Panic rises when it dawns on
and look like he wanted to
apologize like that.
"Kyra." Hayes says, his voice deep and demanding, causing my body to react in a way that makes my eyes
water.
| don't want this pull, this bond. It
feels like | am cheating on Tyler, on our family, that | was too weak to keep together. It takesfurther from
their memory with every little tug. Every scent, every look pults the line more taut, and it makes it so much
harder to be rational. | can't be alone with Hayes. | don't want to be.
"What?" | say, refusing to look at him. His eyes burn into the side of my head, daringto look, but instead, |
look in the opposite direction. "Look at me," He says, his words soft, almost pleading. | turn my head, giving him
my best uninterested scowl.
"What do you need, Hayes?" | ask him.
"I need to make sure you understand my order." He says, his lips pressing together tightly, like he has to know |
won't misbehave.
"Yes, Hayes. | won't fuck anyone in our crew." | roll my eyes. "So happy to know you think so highly of me."
"You were the one that was discussing it, Kyra. Not me." His voice is accusatory.
"Yep," | say, popping the 'p' just to illustrate my annoyance with him.
"Look," He sighs heavily, dragging his hand through his hair and groaning. "I am sorry for how things ended in
our friendship." "Why do you do this?" | ask him, unable to hide the shock | feel so deeply.
"Do what?" he asks, confused.
"Act like a dick and then, for a tiny moment, the old you breaks through. The Hayes that cares and feels
something other than anger."
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"I guess it's just you," He sighs. "Being around you always madefeel like | could be myself."
"Oh? So you shattered that friendship for what reason?" | say, crossing my arms over my chest as | stop walking,
forcing him to look at me.
"You left." He says flatly. | roll my eyes and laugh dryly.
"And how long did it take you to notice that I left?" | ask him. "Or did you forget that the very day after | told you
how | felt, you ignored me, no matter how hard | tried to talk to you?"
"You are being tic." He scoffs. My eyes grow wide, my mouth falling open in disbelief.
"Oh really? Mister mopey, homicidal ex-beta is going to lectureon being tic?"
"You shouldn't have just left." He says, ignoring my jab.
"Did you even notice?" | ask again, narrowing my eyes. He looks away, guilt coloring the unmarked side of his
handsface. My stomach falls when | realize maybe | don't want to know this answer. "I noticed." He
whispers.
"When?" | ask. This tmy voice is softer as | try to keep from breaking. That day, thought him tellingbe
would never love me, then ignoringbroke my heart. But knowing he didn't even realize | had left until days
after | was gone is sout
crushing.
"| went to your house on your birthday to apologize. | noticed you stopped trying to talk to me, so | went to
check on you and-"
The air in the forest feels as if it's been sucked out like a vacuum seal in space. My birthday?! | left five weeks
before my birthday.
"Noted." | clip out, unable to voice how much it hurts. Unwilling to admit to him and myself that it took him just
over a month to notice | was completely gone. Not only was my love for him one sided, but apparently so was
our friendship. "Hayes!" Nisha calls out, sprinting toward us. "We may have something, a camp for one person
and what looks like a nest."
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