Villain Cultivator (Web Novel)

Sidequest: Kunwu's Request

Objective: Steal a heaven-grade weapon from the vault and give it to Jia Shan.

Reward: 100 Luck Points

Note: Upon accepting this quest, Kunwu shall bestow 100 luck points to you as an advanced payment.

…

Sidequest: Sun Crow's Request

Objective: Give Ju Shoufen a heaven-grade armor or robe with fire or poison attribute.

Reward: a supply box from Sun Crow.

…

Sidequest: Tilted Hongjun's Request

Objective: Find a heaven-grade dagger in the Liu Clan's Vault and give it to Ma Moxi

Reward: 100 Luck Points

Note: Upon accepting this quest, Tilted Hongjun shall bestow 100 luck points to you as an advanced payment.

…

Sidequest: OG-Buddha's Request

Objective: Secure the heaven-grade kasaya, which had been stolen from Huangjin Monastery, and give it back to Zhao Bao.

Reward: 500 Luck Points

Note: Upon accepting this quest, OG-Buddha will give 500 luck points to you as an advanced payment.

…

Sidequest: Macho Joshua's Request

Objective: Tribute unused heaven-grade items to Macho Buddha and he shall reward you.

Reward: 50 Luck Points per item.

Note: By putting the item in your inventory, you can tell Dion to tribute them to Macho Buddha.

…

Ding

[Anonymous Devil is looking at several dao gods in envy.]

[Macho Joshua wonders how Anonymous Devil survived after being raided by the Trumpet Alliance.]

[Anonymous Devil flips his middle finger at Macho Joshua.]

As if these dao gods had predicted that Miaomiao needed luck points, they baited him with the quest rewards. All of them also wanted him to fetch an item for their vessels, except for Jesus, who demanded tributes from him.

'Dion. Analysis…'

[Definitely stupid. They are using you, but you should capitalize on this if you want multiple treasures from this place. Also, you're forgetting someone.]

'Who?'

As Miaomiao had been staring at his system screens, Liu Guang had also been looked at her master, wondering how he had gotten in here.

"Err, master? Why are you a lizard again? Have you fought someone recently? Hello? Helloooooo? HALOOOOOOOOO!?"

Liu Guang waved her hands in front of Miaomiao's lizard-like face. Only then, he came back to his senses.

"Oh, it's you."

"That's right. It's me! What the hell, master!? I was standing in front of you the whole time! Why are you giggling and talking to yourself!?"

Liu Guang pouted and cried, believing that Miaomiao had gone insane.

He patted her head to calm her down, "Relax. I'm fine."

"But you look dumb."

"I was never dumb. I just have a second dick in my head."

"…"

"…"

Miaomiao and Liu Guang stared at each other, pausing for a few seconds.

"PFFT!!"

Then, Liu Guang burst into laughter. She laughed so hard that she shed a tear.

"That wasn't supposed to be funny," The corner of Miaomiao's mouth twitched. He just honestly said something without thinking, but Liu Guang lost it.

"But you admitted that you have a dick for a brain!" She continued laughing.

Seeing that Liu Guang's mood brightened, Miaomiao sighed and shook his head, "Well, how is the progress? You've been in here for hours already. How come you are still loitering in here?"

"Oh, that? Here follow me," Liu Guang wiped her tear and led Miaomiao to the main hall, where the mountain of essence cores was.

Among the piles of treasures, Liu Guang picked three items and laid them on the ground for Miaomiao to inspect.

All of them were Chinese dadaos, which had long hilts and machete-like blades. These weapons had a short range, but they were useful at hacking and butchering flesh.

Miaomiao was surprised that Liu Guang was into these odd sabers since most of the slaves preferred either swords or spears as their primary weapons.

"You like these?" Miaomiao pointed at the three dadaos.

"Yup! Master, which one is better? Can you inspect them and tell me which one is better?"

"Can't you just swing it around to test their balance and your compatibility? You're picking your partner, your weapon that will protect your life for years! You're supposed to use your judgment."

"But I can't choose."

Liu Guang looked at Miaomiao with puppy eyes, begging him for his help.

Instead of falling into the charm of this vampire, Miaomiao frowned. He thought about scolding her for a few hours about her indecisiveness and her dependency attitude.

Then, the corner of his eyes glanced at the three dadao by reflex.

"Hmm?"

The three weapons looked different. One of them looked bloody, the second was like a normal saber, and the last one seemed disgusting.

The crimson dadao emitted a similar aura to killing domain as if it had been used to kill a million people. Its red blade screamed and howled, demanding more victims. At the same time, it released extreme yin essence to the air, freezing surrounding moisture and creating layers of red glacial.

Moreover, it contained ice element Qi, which seemed compatible with the succubi, whose primary element Qi was water and ice element.

The green dadao had the smell of grassland and earth. It continuously pacified and merged nearby Qi, gathering random energy into itself. However, it released back some of the refined Qi back to the air as if it was an air conditioner.

Miaomiao recognized this type of Qi. It was Life Essence!

This green dadao generated life essence automatically!

And the last weapon, the blue dadao, was also special. If the red saber represented the dao of death, this blue saber represented the dao of... grotesque monsters.

Random insects, worms, flies, and unknown wobbling flesh came off from the grotesque blade, which seemed to be made from blue flesh and blue blood vessels. Yet, none of the creatures were harmful to Miaomiao or Liu Guang as they disappeared into nothingness a few seconds after they were born.

Miaomiao had the urge to call this blue saber a cursed weapon or a demonic saber, but he changed his mind after he sensed a tinge of blood element Qi and water element Qi in it.

All three heaven-grade dadaos had pros and cons. Indeed, Liu Guang, who could only pick one weapon, would never be able to make the decision easily.

"Guang'er."

"Yeah?"

"I'm going to ask you some questions to determine your personality and your compatibility with the weapons, okay? I want you to answer me within 2 seconds. Speak whatever that comes to your mind first."

Liu Guang tilted her head, not understanding what Miaomiao had planned to do, "Sure?"

"Do you like insects?"

"No."

"Do you like pets?"

"No."

"Do you prefer to fight alone or fight as a team?"

"To be honest, alone."

"Between ordinary weapons and fancy weapons, which one do you prefer?"

"Normal practical ones."

Miaomiao grinned and kicked the blue dadao away.

"Next questions, can you use water or ice element Qi?"

"Umm, yes."

"And, are they your primary elements? Do you fight using them a lot?"

"Yes, most of the time."

"Between auto-essence regeneration perk and enhanced ice element Qi perk, which one do you prefer?"

"The latter one. Nothing can go wrong with the increase in firepower or strength."

Miaomiao kicked the green dadao away. Then, he picked the red saber and shoved it to her hand, "Yours."

"???"

"You were overthinking! This weapon suits you the best, but you hesitated over something else that you couldn't even use! What's the point wasting time here if you don't want to use them!?"

Liu Guang widened her eyes, gazing at Miaomiao in a daze while clapping.

"Wow, master. I didn't know you were this smart!"

"I was always smart! Wait, you thought I was stupid!?"

"You were ALWAYS stupid, master-AHHHHH!! I'M SORRY!!!"

Miaomiao drilled Liu Guang's temples with his lizard knuckles, punishing her for insulting her master's intelligence.

As Miaomiao and Liu Guang were having fun in the space, the three dadaos trembled and moved by themselves.

The two weapons, which had been kicked by Miaomiao earlier, slowly floated in the air, pointing their blades at the kicker.

Then, they rushed toward Miaomiao, planning to impale him!

TING

TING

Unfortunately, Miaomiao's current dragon scales and his skin were not something that could be cut normally. The two dadaos slipped over his skin.

Miaomiao had already seen them coming, but he ignored them. He only flickered his long tongue, sneering at the two living sabers.

"What do you want, suckers? You mad, bro? Oh, you mad because you were abandoned? Sucks to be you."

The two dadaos trembled in rage. They gathered their remaining energy and generated a sword aura, after which they hacked at Miaomiao's lizard-like face.

But Liu Guang raised the red dadao and parried them.

CLANK

CLANK

With one swing, Liu Guang shoved the two flying sabers away. The red sabers also hummed as if they rebuked the other weapons.

The blue and the green weapon paused and sulked, listening to the voiceless yell of the red saber.

Liu Guang stared at the weapon in her hand and the floating sabers before her. She was still shocked by what had happened.

"Umm, master? How are they moving?"

Miaomiao rolled his eyes, "Heaven-grade weapons usually contain a soul inside. If you want to be the master of that red sword, drop your blood on it, and you'll be able to communicate with it. Only then, you can learn of what had happened yourself."

"Oh, I see. That explains a lot."

Liu Guang bit her fingertip and drop her blood onto the red saber. As soon as the blood got on the blade, the red metal absorbed it.

The girl stood still and widened her eyes. She looked around at first and looked at the weapon.

It seemed that she began to hear an unknown voice in her mind, and she started communicating with the weapon now.

As Miaomiao couldn't hear the conversation between Liu Guang and the red dadao, he ignored them.

Also, Miaomiao heaved a sigh of relief as one of his many troubles had been dealt with. Now, she just needed to get out of this place before Miaomiao started looting everything.

Miaomiao turned around and began to survey the place, the two dadaos suddenly rushed toward the red saber in Liu Guang's hand.

"KYAAAA!!"

Hearing the voice of his slave, Miaomiao looked back in shock. He kicked the ground and sprinted toward her.

However, his worry was for nothing. Liu Guang simply stumbled and fell on her butt while the three dadaos floated in front of her, slowly merging into one.

Ding

[Your yin slave, Liu Guang, has formed a bond with the immortal-grade weapon, Fangs of Cerberus!]

…

Underground Dungeon, a kilometer away from the new Shadow Pylon Tower, two men in Mount Hua Sect's uniforms had been standing in front of a large gate with golden words.

"Is this a joke?" Ling Cao read the words while his face distorted in disgust.

Ling Tinglong also had a similar expression as he gazed at the 100 naked butts, which stuck out from the walls in the room.

The golden words were the instruction, which the dungeon master had given to the two men.

[Inseminate the correct hole among the 100 women's holes to obtain the key to the next level. You have 10 minutes to complete this task. Otherwise, this floor will self-detonate and kill everybody here, including the girls.]

At first, Ling Cao regretted leading his disciple and entering the underground dungeon through the secret passage under the summer palace. Now, his face reddened in anger as the dungeon master's action was unforgivable.

Behind them, the entrance to this room had already disappeared, leaving only brick walls with women's buttocks. They no longer had a way to escape other than breaking this dungeon apart.

Ling Cao looked up and unleashed his power, creating illusive swords to dig a hole in the ceiling and the walls, hoping to rescue the girls and escape together with them.

His power caused a dent and a crack to the ceilings at first. Unfortunately, the dungeon continuously repaired itself. The girls were also uncooperative. They refused to move or struggle to break free from the walls.

"Tianlong, I'm sorry," Ling Cao's face darkened, believing that they might be buried alive soon.

Ling Tianlong sighed and shrugged. He bitterly smiled, "Leave it to me."

"What? Are you going to…? That's a disgrace! Are you going to fornicate with those poor prisoners?"

"Nah. Just watch."

Shamelessly, Ling Tianlong stripped his pants and started doing with one of the butts. Also, different from Miaomiao, this protagonist lasted 8 minutes before he ejaculated.

As soon as the deed was done, all women's butt in the room revealed their true appearance, turning into silicone sex dolls.

Ling Cao dropped his jaw in disbelief while Ling Tianlong pulled up his pants and felt refreshed.

The golden words on the giant gate also changed.

[Congratulations! You're the first customer that has passed this level in one try! Damn! Was it a lucky guess, or was it your insight? Anyway, you're qualified to enter the next level!]

The metal gate opened, allowing the master and disciple to dungeon-dive.

However, Ling Tinglong pulled his master back and began talking.

"We want to leave this place. Could you provide us a way out? We promise that we won't come back here anymore!"

On one of the walls, a new sentence appeared.

[Are you giving up already?]

Ling Tianlong nodded. His hunch told him that it was not the time to mess with this unknown dungeon lord.

"Yes. We want to leave."

[Since you're leaving, you must leave all your spatial rings, weapons, and clothes here. Only when you're naked, I'll allow you to get out.]

"…"

Both men grounded their teeth. Karma had just paid them a visit, returning the favor of what they had done to the two thieves earlier.

[By the way, that little guy over there. If you can cross-dress and work for me for a year or two, I'll give you some treasures in return. How's that?]

"No… thanks."

[Shame. Well, since you've refused… STRIP, MOTHERFUCKER! SHOW ME YOUR WHITE BUTT AND YOUR LIMB DICKS, SO I CAN POST IT ON TIKTOXIC!]

"…"